September 23, 2007
Mike Abitabile

The Devil’s Advocate:
Dave Scherer is Confused; Nuts

I was finishing the edits to my column on Sunday afternoon when I saw something Dave Scherer at PWInsider.com posted (here). I was so amused that I decided to hold off my other column for another week and cover this one. The following is a rant by Dave, which some may find amusing, though I found it misinformed, confusing and biased, for multiple reasons:

Here's today's "WWE creative just doesn't get what their product should be all about" moment. For those of you who watched Smackdown and saw the hideous segment where Teddy Long keeled over before he could marry Kristal, well on WWE.com they are playing it up like has had a heart attack. Well, I should say that is what they are trying to play it up as. They actually wrote that WWE doctor Rios said, "“Mr. Long then suffered a myocardial infraction with cardio myopathy. As a result, he is currently semi-comatose.” Uh, I think you mean an "infarction" there Doc. Anyway, once again we see that WWE isn't a wrestling company, they make movies (you know, the kind that bomb their first week in the theatres). Oh yeah, and you want more proof what nitwits they have on creative (which approves everything that goes on the website now)? Check out this gem that was in the same article. "After being rushed to a local medical facility, Long’s doctors claim the groom was suffering from hypertension, which was worsened by the ingestion of the erectile dysfunction medicine Viagra." Boy, that is a real side-slapper isn't it? I can't wait for the ALS and cancer storylines that are sure to follow.

Where to start? First of all, this isn't news. I always say I hate when they mix editorial comments with the news, but this is even worse. It's one big editorial comment, with no news. Save this for the pay site. It seems people enjoy paying to hear his opinions anyways.

Secondly, I'd concede the "infarction" and "infraction" error. But my response to a typo on WWE.com would be: Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

See what he did there? It's not like UPN wasn't a network for 9 months when he wrote that. Oh wait, it wasn’t. People in glass houses……

Next up, the slap in the face about the movies. Maybe "The Condemned" didn't do that well, but "See No Evil" and "The Marine" didn't do that bad and had great DVD sales which helped both movies. According to Box Office Mojo (here), "See No Evil" had a production budget of $8 million and grossed $15 million domestically, and another $16.5 million in DVD rentals and sales. Also, according to Wikipedia (here, although, I don't like using Wikipedia as a source, but Box Office Mojo didn't have a number for the budget), "The Marine" had a production budget of $23 million. Back to Box Office Mojo (here), it grossed almost $19 million domestically and made $30.5 million in DVD sales and rentals. Did they light the world on fire? No, but I wouldn’t consider them “bombs” either since the numbers show they turned profits. Granted, I’m not an executive at a movie company, so all I can do is compare profits to budgets (then again, Dave’s not a doctor, but he does know the difference between an infarction and an infraction). And of course, he failed to mention these numbers.

Next. When he says "they aren't a wrestling company" I think he's a little confused. I watched Smackdown! too and I saw three WRESTLING matches. I think the thing he is confused about is, not only are they a wrestling company, but they are an entertainment company. It's right there in the name... World WRESTLING ENTERTAINMENT.

Dave, they make television shows. You know, with storylines that are fake. And cliffhangers to make you want to come back next week. My sister watches soap operas. And a character had cancer once (I’m sure it’s happened more than once, but I only recall hearing her talk about it one time because I tune her out a lot). Does this mean the soap opera is tasteless? Plenty of characters have cancer in movies, too. And, I mean, you just called WWE a company that makes movies (despite the fact that I watch five hours of TELEVISION shows that they make every week).

Finally, as of right now, I take exception with his sarcastic statement about how Teddy Long’s collapse was due to Viagra making his hypertension worse (“that is a real-side-slapper, isn’t it?”). I don’t think they are playing this off as comedy. Again, I could be wrong depending on where they go with it next week, but from what I saw on Smackdown!, it seemed as if everyone was upset. Even WWE.com isn’t making jokes. Newsflash: old people take Viagra. If anyone is making it into a joke, it’s Dave Scherer who hears “Viagra” and assumes a joke is coming.

I'll say the same thing I always say to those in the wrestling media who pick on WWE so much. If you don't like it and are so offended, stop watching it and stop covering it. You seem to have no problem making a living off the company.

Feedback is always welcome at figurefanatic@gmail.com or you can visit my blog here.

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