May 10, 2008
Mike Abitabile

Hardcore TV
ECW Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

This is a special edition recap (seeing as my normal job here is to do Raw and Nitro recaps) but I wanted to do a write-up for this episode of ECW because it contains one of my favorite ECW moments in the final segment. So, enjoy!

This episode of Hardcore TV contains matches and angles from the January 5, 1996 show at the ECW Arena, entitled “House Party ‘96.” We start the show with footage from last week’s episode. Stevie Richards is telling Blue Meanie he wants to Stevie-Bomb, then Stevie-Kick someone when Shane Douglas walks in and tells then they are speaking grammatically incorrect. This would be Shane’s surprise return after his stint as Dean Douglas in the WWF didn’t pan out as he had hoped (and this was Paul’s way of mocking that gimmick). We go to the theme song and video.

Joey Styles in the ring welcoming everybody to the show. He is interrupted by Bill Alphonso and his whistle. Fonzy says he hates Joey Styles, Tod Gordon and the fans. He wants to know why Joey doesn’t interview him or Taz. Fonzy points to a sign in the crowd that says “Taz is Alphonso’s Bitch” and tells the fans to make good signs. He also doesn’t like the sign that says “Drop Dean Fonzie!” and complains until Joey finally snaps! Joey: “Shut up! I’ve had it with you! Shut your stinkin’ mouth! That’s it!” Joey says Fonzie is ruining the party and that they are going to have to stop the cameras and start taping all over again. Of course Fonzie takes exception and the two continue to trade verbal barbs. That is, until Taz shows up and tells Joey he is sick of his shit. He backs Joey into the corner and tells him keep his hands off Fonzie and stop disrespecting him. The fans chant for Sabu and Taz tells them he isn’t coming. Taz is about to rip Joey’s head off when 911 comes running in. While Fonzie is jaw-jacking with 911, Commissioner Tod Gordon comes in out of nowhere and takes Alphonso down with a right hand! Taz goes after Gordon but 911 stops him. Taz goes right after 911 and doesn’t back down, despite being a lot smaller than him. Fonzie holds back Taz while Gordon holds back 911. Joey is standing on the ring apron calling for some reinforcements. The fleet of ECW referees come in and tries and calms everyone down, but the crowd chants “Let Them Go!” A few wrestlers make their way down now to hold everyone back, including The Pitbulls, Hack Myers, El Puerto Ricano and The Bad Crew. Seeing the Bad Brood, the crowd breaks into a chant of “Bad Crew Sucks!”

The wrestlers and officials are able to get 911 out of the ring, but El Puerto Rican is still in the ring with Taz and Fonzie. Fonzie goes after El Puerto Rican, who is wearing a “Fonzie Must Die” t-shirt, then Taz comes up from behind and hits a sick Head-and-Arm Taz-Plex on the poor guy. Joey rushes in to stand over El Puerto Rican and tells Taz that he is going to kill the kid. Taz grabs Joey again and tells him he’s had enough while Joey begs off and keeps saying “Taz, please, it’s me!” 911 returns and goes nose-to-chest with Taz again but The Eliminators show up to take out 911, while their manager Jason hugs Fonzie. They hit Total Elimination on 911 while Joey makes his way to the broadcast location, gasping for air and scared out of his mind. Taz and Fonzie take off as the Eliminators double team 911. Rey Mysterio, Jr. comes in to the ring out of nowhere wearing an ECW jersey and jumps off the top rope at Kronus, but is caught and dropped to the mat. Kronus goes for a moonsault off the second rope but Rey moves and we’ve got an impromptu match.

The Eliminators (with Jason) vs. 911 and Rey Mysterio, Jr.

Now Saturn goes up top and misses his own moonsault on Rey. Rey hits a slingshot moonsault of his own off the top rope on both Kronus and Saturn! Rey grabs Saturn’s arm and jumps up top. He takes down Kronus with a head scissor and Saturn with an arm drag! The Eliminators are outside the ring and Rey goes up top again and hits a moonsault from the top rope to the floor to take out both Eliminators! Rey takes off his ECW jersey as Joey mentions he is the first person to ever come to the aid of 911. Rey is in the ring with Saturn, who kicks Rey then goes for a power bomb, which Rey reverses into an arm drag. Rey then hits a tilt-a-whirl head scissor and a springboard head scissor! Rey is in total control until Kronus comes up from behind and attacks Rey. He holds Rey up for Saturn to clothesline, but Rey ducks and Saturn takes out his partner! Rey gets a two on Saturn with a roll up from behind. Saturn sends him to the ropes and bench presses Rey but Rey reverses it and takes Saturn over with a head scissor. Saturn dumps Rey out of the ring and goes to work on 911 with a flying clothesline. Kronus works on the knee of 911 until Taz returns and chokes 911 with an orange towel then takes off. Rey and Saturn fight on the outside while Kronus keeps 911 at bay in the ring. Rey hits Saturn with a cookie sheet until Saturn regains the advantage on Rey. Kronus slams Rey and hits a standing moonsault for two. 911 pulls Saturn into the ring then hits a suplex on him! Kronus power bombs Rey and Saturn low blows 911 then they hit Total Elimination on 911! Taz is back again to choke 911 with the towel! After two Total Eliminations and continuous chokes by Taz, 911 is still somehow conscious. Saturn hits a stiff power bomb on Rey then taunts the crowd. Saturn and Kronus send Rey to the ropes and put their heads down too soon, allowing Rey to hit a double DDT! He then goes over to 911. Rey climbs on the shoulders of 911 and challengers the Eliminators to a chicken fight. So Saturn gets up on the shoulders of Kronus then Rey stands up on the shoulders of 911. He then hits a hurricanrana on Saturn while standing on the shoulders of 911 for the win!

After the match, Saturn hits a Dominator on Rey and continues to work on 911. They then hit a Total Elimination on Rey until The Pitbulls makes the save and attack The Eliminators while their manager, Francine, takes out Jason! Meanwhile, 911 goes after Taz in the aisle. The Eliminators then hit Total Elimination on Francine, then bail! Joey says they need Damage Control in the ring right now! Jason comes in and hits the Pitbulls with a chair while they are checking on Francine but this just pisses them off more and they dump him over the top. Damage Control loads Francine onto a gurney then carry her out of the arena. We go to break.

We return from break and Joey informs us that the action we are seeing tonight is from House Party ‘96, which you can own a copy of by calling 1-800-854-5831. We recap everything that has gone down so far. We go to break again.

We return once more with Joey promising an update on Francine’s condition in the near future. He then turns to the return of Shane Douglas to ECW. Joey mocks the WWF saying titles change hands by being handed to people there. Joey says we aren’t sure if Douglas will be able to wrestle again due to the injuries to his back and only time will tell.

Joey sets up the next match by explaining that Buh Buh Ray Dudley was set to face “Gigolo” Jimmy Del Ray when independent manager Damien Kane came out to offer his services to Del Ray. Kane told Del Ray he has a bodyguard for him and produced Mr. Hughes, who used to watch the back of Shane Douglas.

Buh Buh Ray Dudley vs. Jimmy Del Ray

Buh Buh is accompanied by Sign Guy Dudley, Chubby Dudley, DW (Dances With) Dudley and Big Dick Dudley. Del Ray is solo because, as Joey put it, his partner “Zipped’ out of here. The fans really love Buh Buh at this point because he is simple, loves to dance and still stutters. The Dudleys hold up a huge sheet that says “The One and Only Hardcore Extreme Original Sign Guy” which Joey is amazed by. Buh Buh grabs a mic and the crowd chants “What’s Your Name!?” at him. Bub Buh: “My name is Buh Buh Buh…. Buh….” Del Ray dropkicks him from behind to start the match. They exchange fists. Joey says the Gigolo’s partner Zipped out to the WWF where he believes he has a Sunny future. They lock up and Buh Buh backs Del Ray into the corner then hammers away. He sends Del Ray to the ropes then hits a standing dropkick and dances. We cut to later in the match as Jimmy Del Ray chokes Buh Buh over the top rope and sends him into the corner. It is reversed and Buh Buh hits an avalanche splash in the corner. This gets two for Buh Buh, who asks the referee about it allowing Del Ray to go low then slams Buh Buh then head to the second rope and hit a swinging DDT. We again cut to later in the match as Buh Buh goes for a power bomb but is distracted by Mr. Hughes allowing Del Ray to hit Buh Buh from behind. Dudley reverses it and hits a DDT for the win though. Buh Buh hits a huge splash off the top on Hughes but Hughes gets up and tells Buh Buh he knows someone who can fix his speech problem. Shane Douglas returns to a huge ovation. Douglas mocks Buh Buh’s speech impediment. Shane says he was in purgatory but Joey interrupts and says “you were in hell, amigo!” Douglas says things need fixing around here. He’s going to teach Buh Buh proper English and he slaps him! Douglas: “The Franchise is back!”

Joey tells us 2 Cold Scorpio is once again the ECW TV champion and wonders what Cactus Jack will think knowing Raven cost Mikey Whipwreck that belt. Joey tells us he has to go to the ring to interview “Dancin’” Stevie Richards. While he heads there, we go to the back to see Rey Mysterio, Jr. Rey speaks Mexican and DW Dudley comes in and speaks Mexican as well. Rey tries to leave but DW won’t let him go. He finally gets away and we go to the ring.

Stevie tells “Joe-Joe” that he is no longer “Dancin’” Stevie Richards, but from this day forward, he is “Studly” Stevie Richards – The King of Swing. The Blue Meanie and Beulah are with Stevie in the ring. Stevie says Missy Hyatt wants him. We see footage from last month’s Holiday Hell ’95 when Missy was in the audience and kissed Stevie. He calls himself a babe magnet. He thinks Beulah has been neglected by Raven so he wanted to give her a little “late Christmas cheer.” He’s going to kiss her. She says she doesn’t want to be touched. She tells him to leave her alone. Stevie says she is making him look bad in front of everyone. She still says she doesn’t want to be touched. He tries to kiss her and she pushes him away and tells him to stop it. Stevie: “Oh, what’s the matter? Oh, is it because you are Raven’s girlfriend!?” Beulah: “No, I’m pregnant!” Crowd: “OHHHHHHHHH!”

Joey looks floored and doesn’t know what to say. Stevie starts jumping up and down screaming, “I’m gonna be a godfather!” All of a sudden, Raven appears and shoves Stevie out of the way. Raven: “You’re what!? You’re pregnant? What are you, stupid? The pills say, ‘one day at a time,’ moron! What are you, an idiot?” Beulah looks upset and finally says, “What do you care, it’s not yours.” Without missing a beat, Raven turns to Stevie and jumps him. Beulah: “No, stop it! Stop it, it’s not his either!” After a few seconds, she finally drops a bombshell: “It’s Tommy’s.” And with that, Raven grabs her by the throat while Joey screams, “It’s Tommy’s!?” And speak of the devil, Dreamer comes in to make the save! He goes right after Raven and hits the Dreamer DDT! Beulah takes out Stevie and Meanie while Dreamer brawls all around the arena with Raven. Someone hands him a chair and he hits Raven with it. He sends Raven into the guard rail and throws him back in the ring. Tommy grabs a sign from the crowd that says “Tommy, Use My Sign!” and hits Raven over the head with it. The tears the oak tag off to reveal a Stop sign hidden beneath it! He then hits the Dreamer DDT on the Stop sign! Tommy gets a pie from someone in the crowd, takes a bite and then hits a piledriver on Raven, on the pie, on the Stop sign! Beulah gets back in the ring and hugs Tommy.

We cut to a hotel hallway later in the night. Tommy tells us he can learn to love Beulah and will be there for his kid, unlike Raven, who abandoned him. If Raven wants to play a game of one-upmanship, well, Tommy is up one. Dreamer walks into a room where Beulah is laying in bed. Beulah: “Tommy, I want to feel your pain.” Dreamer turns to the camera and just says, “Go.” The cameraman leaves the room, closes the door, and we fade to black.