March 18, 2009
Philip DiLiegro

ECW TV Report for March 17, 2009
Taped 3/16 from San Antonio

The show began with Finlay walking backstage and running into Teddy Long who was wearing a goofy St. Patrick’s Day outfit. Of note, was that Finlay was wheeling in his suitcase which I thought was a major taboo backstage in WWE.

Christian & MVP v. Shelton Benjamin & Mark Henry
MVP and Benjamin began the match. MVP hit a hip toss and a knee lift. Matt Striker ran off a list of Hall of Famers who held the US title and mentioned that Benjamin has held the belt since July. Nice try, but that only serves as a reminder as to how little that title means. Shelton and Henry caught MVP in the corner and went to work as the match went to break. Returning, Henry held a bear hug on MVP and Shelton came in with a suplex. Shelton then went to a rest hold, which will ill-timed since there was just a break to get that move in. MVP finally turned it around with a belly-to-belly suplex. Christian hot tagged in, dodged a couple of Shelton’s moves and hit a reverse DDT for a near fall. Shelton then took a monkey flip but landed on his feet. But Christian followed that up with a sunset flip off of the middle rope for a two count. Christian then hit a tornado DDT, leading to Henry saving. MVP and Christian then both slid outside the ring to trip Mark Henry in a bad spot that took forever to setup. Christian was distracted by the action on the outside and fell victim to the paydirt for the win.
This match wasn’t quite the mess that last night’s money-in-the-bank qualifier was, but was more of a garden variety match. The two minutes that Christian and Shelton had alone were good, but nothing else stood out. So in that light, it failed to create much excitement for money-in-the bank.
Benjamin(x) & Henry d. Christian(o) & MVP, Pin, 9:30.

The announcers pitched to a package promoting 12 Rounds and lead female Ashley Scott. Backstage, Finlay, looking for Hornswoggle, ran into DJ Gabriel and Alicia dancing. They then ran a piece remembering WrestleMania 20; there was predictably no Benoit, but they did show Brock Lesnar, Kurt Angle and Eddie Guerrero.

Evan Bourne v. Jamie Noble
Bourne began with an arm drag and spinning heel kick. Bourne went to a key lock for a moment and missed a charge in the corner. Noble followed up with some stomps and knee drops. Noble went to a came clutch. Bourne came out of that and climbed the ropes into a huracanrana. He followed up with a spinning heel kick and a standing moonsault. That led to a near fall. Bourne hit an enzuigiri and another round kick. Bourne then finished with the shooting star press.
I wish they would have given this match more than three minutes because Bourne is the type who would not be hurt by having a competitive ten minute match, even against Noble. During the match, they showed Tyson Kidd watching backstage on a monitor, which leads one to believe we could be on the verge of seeing a heck of a feud (in-ring anyway). Off the topic, Striker and Grisham had a great exchange before the match began wrapping 80s music, movies and wrestling together:
Grisham: Bourne reminds me of that Berlin song “Take My Breath Away.”
Striker: OK Iceman and I don’t mean Parsons.
Bourne d. Noble, Pin, 2:55, **.

Backstage, Hornswoggle was throwing food and drink at Katie Lea who, instead of running away, just stood there and flailed her arms to and fro.

Jack Swagger then came out to cut a promo from the top of the ramp. Swagger put over his good looks and his all-American designations. And that was it, so there was not even a hint of a WrestleMania match. So the ECW champion has been on ECW for a grand total of sixty seconds in two weeks. But wait there’s more. Backstage, Tiffany proposed to Teddy Long that next week be divas night on ECW. Sadly, Teddy thought that was a great idea. So, in all likelihood, it will be sixty seconds over three weeks for Swagger.
Anyway, the Burchills then walked in the room complaining about Hornswoggle. Teddy then made a match between Burchill and Finlay for later tonight.

Finlay v. Paul Burchill
Matt Striker let us know the history behind St. Patrick’s Day and the Ides of March. Striker, having his best night with the one-liners in a while, made an allusion to the 80s cult classic Pee Wee’s Playhouse. Todd Grisham then ruined the subtlety. Finlay landed a European uppercut and a reverse DDT on the knee to begin. Finlay backdropped Burchill to the floor while Hornswoggle was behaving nuts on the outside. Burchill took advantage to the distraction and gained the upper hand. Finlay broke out of a chin lock and dragged Burchill onto the ring apron. Inside, Finlay hit a clothesline and a senton. That led to the Celtic cross for the win. This was a glorified squash designed to spotlight Finlay on St. Patrick’s Day.
Finlay d. Burchill, Pin, 3:04, ˝*.

The main event of the show was an episode of the Dirt Sheet with guests the Bella Twins. Morrison took a shot at the crowd. The storyline is now that one Bella (Brie) likes the Colons while the other (Nikki) likes Miz and Morrison. The hosts pitched to footage of their win over the Colons last Friday on Smackdown. Miz and Morrison then broke their ass masks and made fart jokes. This is one of those moments that makes you glad that you watch this show alone. The Colons then came out with the set to Carlito’s Cabana. Carlito said both guys look better with the masks on and issued a challenge for WrestleMania. Carlito made the logical argument that since each team has successfully defended their titles, that their match at WrestleMania will unify the titles. Miz and Morrison thankfully accepted. Carlito then went to spit the apple at Morrison, who ducked the apple which hit Brie Bella. Brie then shoved her sister down to the mat leading to the cat fight. So, each team leaves with a Bella twin and we have the rare promising undercard match at WrestleMania. The show concluded on a down note as Todd Grisham said that someone will leave WrestleMania as unified champions for the first time ever. Were it not for the first seventeen events, he would be right.

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