July 10, 2011
The Powerdriver Review
TNA Final Resolution 2006
January 15, 2006
OH SNAP! My childhood hero is back in black again. THE STINGER! Was it a big mistake on TNA’s part? We’re about to find out. I still say they should’ve waited until Benoit’s contract was up and sign him instead. History proves that nostalgia is only cool until the high wears off.
Your hosts are Mike Tenay & Don West.
- Roderick Strong, Austin Aries & Alex Shelley vs. Matt Bentley, Sonjay Dutt & Chris Sabin (w/Traci)
Oh. My. Gosh. Traci is looking HOT in her school girl’s outfit. Sabin has a new look! He’s bleached some of his hair and has a ring jacket now! That’s fine with me. This match has the tendency to rock my face off. Sabin and Shelley start off by working the crowd. Sabin gets suckered in from a test of strength and then gets his face ripped off. Shelley runs into a boot from the corner and then takes an arm drag. Snapmare and stiff kick is followed by a basement dropkick to the back of Shelley’s head. Tag to Sonjay, and he and Sabin do a double-team powerbomb press onto Shelley for a quick near-fall. Shelley BITES his way out of a front headlock and then tags in Strong. Sonjay arm drags out of several backbreaker variation attempts, and then locks on an armbar. Tag to Bentley and he works the arm. Strong backs Bentley into a corner. Strong misses a blow, and gets whipped and that time, the satellite feed seemed to go out. Bentley now has Strong down in armbar, but he stomps out of it and tags in the former ROH WORLD CHAMP who defeated SAMOA JOE for the strap, Austin Aries! Aries comes in and misses a clothesline and takes an atomic drop for it, falling into the face corner. He gets ping-ponged between Sabin, Dutt and Bentley until Bentley delivers a bridge suplex for a near-fall. Sonjay tags back in, and whips Aries into the corner. Dutt gets elevated out onto the apron. He blocks a punch from Aries and tries for that sprinkler rope walk thing he does, but Strong comes over and crotches him. Strong comes in and nails both Bentley and Sabin to bring them in so that the Generation NEXT can triple-team Sonjay! Strong & Aries make a scaffold out of Sonjay so that Shelley can LEAP off the top to DOUBLE STOMP him across the ribs! NICE! Shelley covers for a two, but he’s not even the legal guy? They show Dave Hebner looking on. He looked really confused as to where he was at. Strong tags in and hits a butterfly suplex for two. Aries tags in and delivers a springboard knee drop across the back of a VERTICAL Sonjay Dutt. A snap back suplex gets two. Aries hangs Sonjay out to dry in his own corner, which allows Strong to pull him off of the top rope and back out onto the floor. Aries taunts Sabin & Bentley while Strong works him over on the floor. We now see that Jerry Lynn is even looking on this match. Strong rolls Sonjay back for Aries to cover him for two. Shelley tags in and we get a catapult-running kick combo move from him and Strong. Strong nails Sabin & Bentley in order to bring them in and distract the ref so that Aries can do a senton on Sonjay who is lying across Shelley’s legs! Shelley maneuvers that over into an STF, and then goes into a Rings of Saturn with the legs still grapevined! Shelley tags in Strong and that leads to more classic heel cheating by delivering a triple-team flapjack to Sonjay. Strong covers for two. Sonjay tries to fight back with a few kicks, but a Strong forearm puts him back down. Sonjay flips up out of the corner and kicks Strong back. He follows up with a NICE tilt-a-whirl DDT! Sonjay is looking for a tag and he gets to Sabin! Strong tags in Shelley and he leaps off the top, only to be met with a KICK to the gut from Sabin. Standing rana by Sabin is followed up a running kick into the corner! NOWHERE TO GO FOR SHELLEY! Tree of woe for Shelley and then he tastes a nice sliding dropkick to the face! SABIN DOES ANOTHER ONE! KISS YOUR HEAD GOODBYE, Shelley! Aries comes in and takes a drop toe-hold right into Shelley’s balls! Strong sneaks up behind Sabin and he turns around into a fireman’s carry position. Sabin escapes and shoves Strong into the ropes and catches him with a mule kick. Sabin does the spot where he kicks two other guys before dropping the tornado DDT. “HAIL SABIN!” chants go up! Sabin delivers an enziquri to Shelley and tries for the CRADLE SHOCK, but he escapes. Shelley shoves Sabin into the ropes, but his clothesline is blocked. Sabin nails him with another quick enziquri. Bentley comes off the top and nails an elbow drop. He covers, but moves as Aries tries to make a save to elbow drop Shelley. Aries gets dumped and Shelley takes a hip toss from Bentley for two. Strong breaks up the pin and hits a Yerinagi slam into a backbreaker. Sonjay comes in and delivers an Ultimo Dragon DDT while getting some MAJOR airtime! Sonjay calls for the HINDU PRESS on Strong, but Aries runs in and shoves Sonjay off the top and out onto the floor. Aries goes up top and gets shoved off out onto the floor by Sabin! Sabin goes airborne and nails Aries with a SUICIDE DIVE thru the ropes! There’s a flatliner in the ring from Bentley to Shelley, and he sets up for the superkick. Strong stops that with a running dropkick! Traci is up on the apron, so Strong goes over to grab her. Bentley doesn’t like that and delivers a superkick to Strong! Shelley runs over and gets a SUPER fast rollup on Bentley for the surprise three-count! GENERATION NEXT WINS AGAIN! (10:34) This was already better than anything seen on the previous week’s WWE PPV. ***
- The Diamonds in the Rough (w/Simon Diamond) vs. The James Gang
Tenay lets us know that first thing that this is the first time these two guys, Kip James (Billy Gunn) and BG James (Road Dogg), have tagged together in nearly six years. Are they going to do their old shtick? Of course they do. Ha, BG says pizzle and gizzle. Will Kip tell me if I’m not down with the James Gang, that I can suck it? Nope, he tells me he’s got three words for me. “Get it, got it, good.” Wow, did NOT see that coming. It looked like BG told Kip that that was five words, not three. He was all like, “Huh?” Hahahaha, beer. James Gang vs. AMW! Who’s with me? I want to see that. BG and Skipper start off with some lock ups and reversals. Skipper takes BG down with a HARD shoulderblock and then badmouths him. “THIS IS MY HOUSE!” Skipper works the arm and then takes BG down with another shoulderblock. BG comes back with a little SHAKE, RATTLE and ROLL. He follows up with the 1997 original, the shaky legs knee drop for two. Skipper does his MATRIX move out of the pin attempt. BG looks freaked out so he tags in Kip. Skipper tags in Young, so Kip gives him a crotch-chop and tells him to “SUCK THAT!” They do some powerful lock-ups and then a shoulderblock test. Young ducks low and tries to outsmart Kip, but he takes a kick to the face. They run the ropes until Skipper comes in and they try a double-team move, but they both end up taking a Japanese arm drag from Kip. BG comes in and clotheslines both Skipper & Young out to the floor. BG & Kip goes out after them during a big “New Age Outlaws” chant. Back in, BG gets caught with a beautiful SPINEBUSTER on Young. Skipper tags in and snapmares BG over for a STIFF kick. BG looks pretty dead, so Skipper covers for two. Tag to Young and we get a double-team drop toehold/basement dropkick combo from the Diamonds. Young covers for two. Young sets up BG for a top-rope moonsault, but he misses! Hot tag to Kip and he takes out both Young & Skipper. A big powerslam to Young brings Simon Diamond up on the apron. He gets nailed and then Kip tries a corner splash on Skipper, but he avoids it. Skipper nails a clothesline for two. BG breaks up the pin and tries for the PUMPHANDLE SLAM on Skipper, but not before dry-humping him first. Young breaks that up and knocks BG out to the floor. Young follows out after him. Meanwhile, Skipper tries the PLAY OF THE DAY on Kip, but he blocks it and delivers a COBRA CLUTCH SLAM for the three-count. (7:49) * ½ That was decent enough for me.
We go to the back with Shane Douglas standing alongside Christopher Daniels. Douglas asks Daniels if he thinks he came back too soon from his concussion. Daniels says he’s not afraid to shed blood against Samoa Joe. Daniels says it comes down to what they believe. Joe believes he’s unbeatable, but Daniels believes there is a big difference between unbeaten and unbeatable. Joe’s reign of terror is going to come to an END, MUTHATRUCKER! Hey Joe, you better say your prayers! I definitely loved that promo.
- Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. AJ Styles – International X Match
Tanahashi wears his NJPW U-30 title belt to the ring. This is cool. I’ve never seen or even heard of Tanahashi until TNA. They lock up and some mat reversals, followed by a stand off. They trade hammerlocks during some dueling chants from the crowd. Tanahashi kicks out and snaps an arm drag. AJ fights up for a second, but goes back down to an armbar. AJ gets up for good this time and delivers his awesome flip dropkick. AJ does a fake dive as Tanahashi gets out of the way. Back in, they trade some STIFF chops. AJ wins that and delivers his cocked-back high knee drop across Tanahashi’s forehead for two. Tanahashi fights up with some STRONG STYLE forearms and then nails a SICK release German suplex! Tanahashi whips AJ into the ropes and takes him down with a flying forearm. He follows up with a Sting-like elbow drop and a senton splash for two. AJ tries to fight back, but gets put in an ab stretch. AJ gets to the ropes, but then Tanahashi chokes on him. AJ comes off the ropes and they reverse each other’s attempt at the sleeper until Tanahashi finally gets it. Tanahashi maneuvers that into the Dragon sleeper! He then proceeds to SWING AJ AROUND while STILL in the Dragon sleeper and then drives an elbow on the way down! He covers AJ, but he’s got his knee across AJ’s throat. Tanahashi sets up AJ for a middle-rope elbow drop but it misses. Enziquri by AJ sends Tanahashi down face-first. Tanahashi blocks a suplex and AJ out onto the apron. AJ nails Tanahashi with a forearm and then delivers a springboard forearm shot! AJ gets his suplex into a reverse neckbreaker for a near-fall. They both eat a boot from each other’s charges into the corner, but Tanahashi gets the advantage from hitting a nice full-nelson slam for two. West of course called that a powerbomb. AJ misses a wild kick, so Tanahashi connects with an enziquri. Tanahashi comes off the ropes with a running neckbreaker for a near-fall. Tanahashi sets up AJ on the top turnbuckle for a back superplex, but AJ maneuvers around and lands on Tanahashi down on the mat. Once they both rise up, they trade waistlocks until SHANNON MOORE comes down to ringside! He slides a chair into the ring. While the ref gets it out of the ring, Moore slides in and goes to nail AJ, but he ducks and nails Tanahashi with that Mr. TNA award he stole from AJ! AJ hits the pele on Moore and he goes rolling out to the floor. Ref Rudy Charles kicks the award out of the ring. The STYLES CLASH wins it. (11:05) Pretty good match, but a clean finish would’ve been better. Post-match, AJ checks to make sure Tanahashi is okay. Tanahashi even gives him the Mr. TNA award back! But not before Moore sneaks in and steals the award again! ** ½
Shane Douglas is in the back with Raven. Douglas says he knows how dangerous Raven can be because he’s in been in the ring with him. Douglas says its do or die time for Raven. Raven calls Zbyszko a festering piece of dung and a diseased yak. He’s also a fascist and a bully. He says Zbyszko has made his life a living hell. Wrestling is his mistress, his passion and his love. It’s the one thing at night that keeps him from blowing his brains out. Wow, someone needs a life. He also comments that Zbyszko should have better things to as commissioner instead of ruining his life, like filing paperwork or tossing salads. Destiny is at work, but no matter the result, somebody is going to get hurt. He says Zbyszko better pray to God that it’s him. Quote the Raven, nevermore.
- Sean Waltman vs. Raven – No-DQ Match
I can’t believe they brought him back, again. If Raven wins this match, he gets his NWA World title shot. If he loses, his career in TNA is over. They’ve spent the last four months burying him so much, that he couldn’t possibly win this. No one would care to see Raven get a title shot now. Raven brings with him his cart of toys to the ring. Waltman comes out after him, so Raven rams the shopping cart right into him before the match starts. Raven then chases Zbyszko around the ring, but then he gets met by Waltman with a trashcan lid. Waltman tosses a trashcan full of stuff into the ring. In they go, where Waltman attacks Raven with a kendo stick. Raven ducks the first trashcan shot, but doesn’t on the second one. Raven gets in his lick too with a trashcan lid. Raven rolls out to the floor to regroup. Zbyszko is still at ringside and he goes over and tells Raven to get up and fight the guy. Raven is busted open and he crazily goes after Zbyszko, but the security guys hold him back. Waltman comes off the top and dives out onto security and Raven to take them all out. Waltman grabs the shopping cart and he wheels it hard into Raven all around ringside and up the entryway. Raven grabs a trashcan lid that fell from the shopping cart and decks Waltman in the face with it. THREE TIMES! Raven sticks Waltman in the shopping cart and then pushes him off the stage! Waltman fell on his tailbone on the corner of the stage before he rolled out onto the floor. Jackass has got nothing on TNA. Raven has the cart again and rams it straight into Waltman’s head. They go back into the ring, but not before Raven can pull a table AND a ladder out from underneath the ring. Waltman ducks a Raven clothesline, so the ref takes it instead who rolls out to the floor. Nevertheless, Raven gets the RAVEN EFFECT, but there’s no ref. Waltman runs at Raven with a trashcan, but it gets kicked back into his face. Raven covers and Zbyszko comes in, acting like he’s going to count the pinfall. He counts two, but then goes REALLY slow on the third try for Waltman to get his shoulder up. Waltman low-blows out of a ten-count corner punch. He hits a bad-looking X-FACTOR, which gets two. It was a fair count, too! Waltman takes the ladder and sets it on the bottom corner. He then takes a weight-lifting belt and whips Raven with it. Waltman lays Raven on the ladder and whips him in the FACE with the belt. We now see Dave Hebner from one of the entryways looking on this match too. Waltman tries a bronco-buster, but Raven moves and Waltman busts his own balls. Raven covers and Zbyszko does a slow count which Waltman rolls the shoulder at two. West ~ “I had two birthdays before Larry got that count in.” Really Don? It literally took over TWO YEARS for that count? What calendar do you GO by? Raven is getting pissed and he lets Zbyszko know it. He sets up the table AND the ladder! Raven climbs the ladder and pulls Waltman up with him! I smell a finish coming up. Raven wants to RAVEN EFFECT Waltman off the ladder, but Zbyszko yanks on Raven’s foot. Waltman counters with an X-FACTOR OFF THE LADDER ONTO THE TABLE! Waltman covers Raven and gets three even though Raven had his foot on the rope after two. (8:10) Post-match, Raven still has his foot on the rope while Waltman and Zbyszko celebrate. Even Jeremy F’N Borash shows Larry that Raven’s foot is clearly on the bottom rope, but Zbyszko stands by his decision. Raven must now leave TNA and the crowd boos this like crazy. Zbyszko tells Raven that he looks like he died. Haha, one of the security guys pats on the ring to try and get Raven out of the ring as if he were a house pet or something. The crowd chant for “Raven” and he looks to be exiting the ring until CASSIDY RILEY comes down. He yells at Zbyszko, but Raven tells him to stop and then Raven leaves quietly with the security guys. Haha, Don West tries to give Raven a pat on the back on his way out, but Raven reverses THAT and West has to REACCCCHH out to touch Raven. Don West does not matter to Raven. I love it. Oh yeah, and Cassidy stands in the ring in disbelief. RAVEN GOT ROBBED! ** ¼
Douglas is in the back with Ron “DA TRUF” Killings and he mentions how Killings is now all on his own with no back-up. So what? Not every wrestler has back-up, Shane. Killings says incoherent until the “King of Incoherent English Speech” himself, KONNAN drops by. Konnan is mad that Killings isn’t calling him back. Killings says he isn’t mad because he’s free from drama. IT’S ON! Konnan asks Killings if he can still trust him, so Killings replies with, “I don’t know who to trust.” Killings says Bullet Bob was like 3LK’s daddy, K-Dawg. Truth says the only person he can trust is himself. Konnan gets all mad and leaves. Next match, please.
Tenay & West are still pondering about Raven actually being gone from TNA. Tenay mentions the suicide comment Raven made earlier in his promo. West brings up something COMPLETELY opposite by talking about the time Raven debuted and stole the NWA World Title. The man mentioned SUICIDE, Don!
Larry meets Raven in the back and tells him, “Don’t forget your bag!” and tosses him his bag before he leaves. JACKIE GAYDA swings by and tells Larry to calm down. She tells Raven that they have something in common. They’ve both been screwed by “some people”. She tells Raven that it’s a lot bigger than what you think. Jackie says to Larry, “Let’s go, Grandpa! I’ve got a bone to pick with you.” Raven just stands there, looking totally confused and BLOODY!
- Bobby Roode (w/Coach Scott D’Amore) vs. Ron “DA TRUF” Killings
Truth gets a quick rollup to start things off and try to finish this off FAST! They have a shoving contest that results into another quick rollup for two. Roode goes out to the floor to regroup with D’Amore. Back in, Roode walks right into a drop toehold and then a front headlock. Roode counters that into a hammerlock. Truth stands up and reverses into a hammerlock of his own and then moves to a side headlock takedown. Roode counters with a headscissors, but Truth counters that into a pin attempt. Roode bridges up and tries a backslide but Killings won’t go down. Roode goes to a side headlock again and reverses a whip into the ropes, but falls to a sunset flip for two. They follow that up with a nice little roll-up sequence to a hand clap and praise from the crowd. Roode gives the universal “UP YOURS!” signal and walks out of the ring and up the ramp. D’Amore grabs him by the arm and tells him to get back in the ring! Truth takes advantage of the situation by delivering a plancha out onto Roode. Truth punishes Roode with a series of rights before turning his back on him to chase off D’Amore. Truth turns around and gets lifted in the air and driven spine-first into the steel ringpost. Roode gets back in the ring so D’Amore can kick on Killings before sending him back into the ring. Roode covers and gets two. Roode stomps Killings down onto the mat and then chokes on him with his boot. Roode delivers a gourdbuster on the top rope on Killings. Roode slaps on an ab stretch and of course uses D’Amore’s hockey stick for leverage. The ref sees what’s happening on his third look-over, and Roode lets go of the stick which sends D’Amore falling back to the guardrail. Roode stops to yell at D’Amore, which allows Killings to roll up Roode for a near-fall. Roode shoots right back up with a clothesline. Roode sets up Killings for a middle-rope knee drop, and it connects for a two-count! Bearhug applied by Roode, but Truth fights up only to go back down to a forearm to the kidneys. Roode whips Killings into the corner, but eats an elbow on his way in. He meets a big kick to the face on the second charge. Truth flips up to the top turnbuckle and hits a missile dropkick. Truth comes back with rights and then a flying forearm for two. Truth gets caught in the corner off a whip reversal and Roode tries for snake-eyes, but Truth counters that with a shove into the corner. Truth splits to avoid a clothesline and then nails a jumping heel kick for two. Roode fights off a superplex and connects with a crossbody block from the top only to have Truth roll through it for two. Here comes KONNAN! Truth splits to avoid the NORTHERN LARIAT, but now Konnan is on the apron. Konnan starts talking to Killings, so Roode comes off the ropes and nails the NORTHERN LARIAT for the three-count. (9:52) Post-match, Konnan tries to make nice with Killings, but it isn’t happening. BG comes down to try and get at Konnan, so that brings in HOMICIDE and we have a LAX beatdown on BG James with Killings staying out of it. Kip James comes down with a chair and saves BG. * ½
We now go to the back with Shane Douglas standing alongside ABYSS and JAMES MITCHELL. Mitchell says that tonight, Abyss has Rhino scheduled for extinction. Oh yeah, and Abyss makes a whole lot of racket.
- Abyss (w/James Mitchell) vs. Rhino
Rhino runs down to ringside and goes RIGHT after Abyss. Rhino ducks low off a whip and gets hammered on his back. Rhino blocks a hip-toss and drops Abyss with a clothesline. Abyss reverses a whip into the corner, but eats boot off a charge. Rhino runs off the ropes and clotheslines Abyss crashing down to the floor. Rhino tries a PESCADO and falls on Abyss’ neck and back! Rhino takes Abyss to the guardrail. Abyss comes back with a knee and then drives Rhino’s head into the ring. Abyss grabs a steel chair from under the ring and then he levels Rhino with it a few times. Rhino fights back with some punches and then tosses Abyss back in the ring. Rhino does a snapmare/basement dropkick combo to Abyss, followed by a running legdrop for two. Abyss reverses a HARD whip into the corner, where Rhino just falls to the mat. Abyss wedges a chair in the corner, but Rhino puts on the brakes off a whip. Abyss ducks a clothesline and then sends Rhino crashing into the chair. Abyss chokes on Rhino and then chases the ref out of the ring. Abyss goes to a neck vice. Rhino fights up with rights, but then goes down to a big boot for two. Abyss goes back to the neck vice again, but Rhino rises up and then delivers a TKO! Back up, Rhino hits a clothesline and then a running shoulder block into the corner. He grabs the chair and nails Abyss with it square in the head! TWO TIMES! The crowd chants, “One more shot!” and he does it! Mitchell distracts Rhino while he sets up for the GORE, but Abyss gets to his feet and grabs his chain. He wraps it around his hand and then punches Rhino in the face! It only gets two! Rhino reverses a whip into a spine buster for a near-fall. Rhino sets one chair on top of the other and calls for the RHINO DRIVER! Mitchell grabs Abyss’ legs to keep that from happening, which TOTALLY pisses off Rhino. He turns around into a GOOZLE from Abyss, but counters that with a low blow! Rhino comes off the ropes, but gets caught in the BLACK HOLE SLAM onto the chairs for the win! (9:18) ** ½
Shane Douglas is in the back with Team 3D. Ray says that tonight after they win the NWA tag belts, they will be added to the list of the greatest teams in wrestling history. Devon says AMW picked the wrong team to screw with and that they will do whatever it takes to win the belts. TESTIFY!
- NWA World Tag Team Champions AMW (w/Gail Kim) vs. Team 3D
The crowd is PUMPED for this! Tenay lets us know Don’s mic is not working, but they’re fixing it. I wondered why he was RUINING this moment! James Storm starts off with Brother Devon, as they lock-up in the middle of the ring. They trade waistlocks until Devon gets a takedown and goes to a front headlock. Storm rolls out of it into a side headlock of his own. Devon shoots him off into the ropes, but is taken down with a shoulder block. They run the ropes a bit until Devon delivers a hiptoss. Devon follows up with a dropkick and then a slam. They both miss an elbow drop and now Don West is back. It was so nice just having Tenay call this, now this match is TAINTED. They do a stand off, but Harris comes in and does a Pearl Harbor job as Gorilla Monsoon would call it, on Devon. Now Storm with the advantage, he takes Devon into the AMW corner and tags in Chris Harris. They do a double-whip, but Devon comes off the ropes with a double-clothesline. He tags in Brother Ray, and he goes right after Harris. Ray is all over Harris as the crowd chants “3D”. Harris comes back with a clothesline and covers him for two. Ray comes back with some LOUD AND HARD open hand chops on Harris. Ray nails Harris off a charge into the corner. Ray goes up and tries that senton back splash he 99.9% misses, and this time is no different. Tag to Storm and he delivers a clothesline and then chokes on Ray. Harris tags in and we get another double-whip by AMW. They both duck too soon and Harris gets dumped. Now Ray tags Devon, and he hits his spinning back elbow and then a reverse neckbreaker for two. Spinebuster by Devon gets another two. Ray comes in and it’s time for the WAZZUP head butt. TESTIFY DANCE! DEVON, GET THE TABLES! Team 3D goes out and grabs a table. They put it on the apron vertically, so Storm tries a baseball slide! MISS! Team 3D backs up with the table and SLAMS it in Storm’s face! They put it back on the apron the same way as before and Harris comes by and baseball slides the table into Team 3D. Storm sets up the table on the outside. Storm thinks he’s going to powerbomb Devon through it, but Ray is right there to put a stop to that. Back in the ring, Harris chokes away on Devon with his wrist tape, and then brings him and clotheslines him with it. Tag to Storm and he connects with a knee drop, followed by a chinlock. “DEVON” chants start up! Devon fights up, but then takes a knee to the gut. Storm tags in Harris, and he misses a charge into the corner and goes shoulder-first into the ring post. HOT TAG to Brother Ray and he is a house of fire on Harris! Hiptoss for Harris and a back drop for Storm. Double clothesline for AMW! Side slam for Harris gets two. Storm grabs hold of Ray off a whip and then Harris charges and nails Storm! DDT for Harris gets a near-fall as Storm makes the save. Devon is in and he takes a vertical suplex from Harris while Storm wails away on Ray. AMW catches Ray in a short variation of the Hart Attack for a near-fall. Double-suplex on Devon! AMW calls for the DEATH SENTENCE on Ray, but Devon saves him by shoving Harris off the top onto the mat! Storm gets elevated out onto the apron with Devon and gets nailed. Devon goes up top and is met by Harris. Harris looks to be going for a superplex, but Ray comes behind him and lands a forearm in his back to set up the DOOMSDAY DEVICE for the CLOSE near-fall! The crowd just HATES that! Storm is back in and he gets dumped right back out. Harris is up with a big boot for Ray. He covers for two. Now Storm has a chair! Harris is telling him to get in the ring! Harris reaches over the top to grab at Storm, but Storm has his back turned and swings the chair and nails Harris in the head! He stumbles back into a REVERSE 3D! Ray covers and gets ANOTHER HOT near-fall! Storm comes back in and delivers a SUPERKICK to Devon! Ray whips Storm into the corner and follows him in but he takes a boot to the face. Storm goes up top and then gets shoved off out and THROUGH the table on the floor! Ray ducks a clothesline from Harris and rolls him up for ANOTHER SO FREAKIN’ CLOSE near-fall! Harris jumps right back up with a clothesline for Ray. Gail Kim slides in the ring hands Harris some powder IN PLAIN VISION OF THE STUPID BLIND REF. Ray sees it and shoves it back in Harris and the ref’s faces! 3D to Harris! Devon brings the ref over to count, and 3D gets three! WHAT A POP! Team 3D embrace each other while the ref is still blinded. TEAM CANADA shows up with hockey sticks and they beat on Team 3D and then put Harris on top of Ray so when the ref “revives” himself, he can think that he counted Ray’s shoulders to the mat and not Harris’ shoulders. Those are some CLEVER Canadians. Ref Rudy Charles walks over and lifts Harris’ arm as the victor. TEAM 3D WAS SO SCREWED! (12:39) You’ve got to be kidding me with that finish. ** ½
We go to back with Shane Douglas and he wants to hear what JJ and Monty have to say about Sting & Christian. JJ says Sting and Christian both want what he has; the NWA World title. Therefore, they can’t possibly co-exist. Monty says he’s the flavor of the millennium. They will both feel the pounce, period.
- NWA X-Division Champ Samoa F’N Joe vs. Christopher Daniels
Joe has a clean towel to soak in Daniels’ blood. It’s those awesome little touches that make Samoa Joe so great, not even mentioning his in-ring stuff. To start, Daniels avoids some kicks and blows from Joe until he finds his opening and fires away on Joe. Joe fights back with HARD knee shots to the ribs. Daniels ducks a headbutt in the corner and then fights back with forearm blows to the head. Daniels ROCKS Joe with a forearm off the ropes, and then charges at Joe in the corner with a running knee to the chest. Daniels follows up with a hiptoss, headscissors takedown, and then a hurracanrana. Daniels whiffs on the running dropkick, however, and Joe comes back with kick after kick. Joe takes him in the corner and delivers some ridiculous back-handed chops to the chest. Daniels ducks a clothesline and then grapevines the leg over into a pinning combination for two. Another rollup by Daniels gets two. Joe holds onto Daniels’ arm and goes right into a modified Rings of Saturn armbar. Daniels makes the ropes and fights up with back elbows to the gut of Joe. Joe reverses a whip into the ropes and then arrogantly side steps Daniels’ asai moonsault attempt, sending him crashing to the mat. Joe kicks Daniels a foot off the mat. Joe stomps away on Daniels’ head while he tries to cover up. Joe does his patented combo where he delivers a snapmare, back-handed chop to the neck, kick to the chest and then a jumping knee drop for two. Joe misses a charge into the corner. Daniels tries to take him down with clotheslines, but Joe isn’t going down. The standing dropkick sends Joe back a bit, but then Daniels comes off the ropes and gets caught in that SICK snap powerslam for two! Joe whips Daniels in the corner, but he eats a boot. Daniels jumps up in the air and drops Joe jaw-first across his knees! OUCH! STO slam from Daniels sets up a split-legged moonsault for two! Daniels sets Joe up on the top turnbuckle and then delivers an AWESOME DVD! He covers, but only gets two! Joe blocks a ‘rana with a powerbomb which gets two. Daniels with a double-leg takedown and he goes forearm crazy on Joe! Joe stops that with a leg scissors. Daniels misses a kick so Joe trips him up and puts on the STF, but Daniels makes the ropes! Joe sets up Daniels on the top turnbuckle looking to go for a superplex, but Daniels fights back and slides down and tries a powerbomb. Joe counters that with a HURRACANRANA! OH MY GOSH! Daniels back up and he gets LEVELED with a clothesline! Joe covers, but it just gets two! Joe comes off the ropes and gets caught with a Yerinagi slam! Can Daniels pull off the BME?! YES HE CAN! He covers, but it only gets a near-fall. Joe goes out to the floor and then yanks Daniels off the apron to the floor with him. Daniels fights back with forearms and then gets back on the apron where he KO’s Joe with a sick kick to the head. Daniels goes back in the ring and hits a SLINGSHOT elbow drop to the floor! Daniels definitely bruised his hip there. Daniels sends Joe back into the ring, but that leaves Joe with an open kick to Daniels’ concussed head. Joe then charges and kicks Daniels off the apron out to the floor. Joe sets the chair up beside the guardrail and puts Daniels in it for the OLAY kick! Daniels is busted wide open after that. Back in, Joe keeps stomping on his head. Here comes AJ STYLES down to ringside. Joe continues with more blows to the head in the corner. Daniels fights back with forearms and tries for the ANGELS WINGS! He can’t lift Joe up for it though. He can’t stand up! Joe comes back with kicks to the head. MUSCLE BUSTER BY JOE! KOKINA CLUTCH on Daniels! He somehow reaches the bottom rope before Joe can get him in the body scissors. Joe tosses a chair in the ring while glaring over at AJ. MUSCLE BUSTER ON THE CHAIR! More EVIL kicks to the head! Joe then delivers some BRUTAL knee shots to the head, neck and shoulders of Daniels. Tenay is SCREAMING for someone to stop this match! AJ grabs Joe’s towel while begging for Joe to stop. Joe doesn’t stop whatsoever, so AJ tosses the towel in for Daniels. Joe wins again. (15:36) Why AJ has the authority to stop this match, I’ll never know. That was some pretty brutal stuff, but it just wasn’t long enough. JOE IS A MONSTAR! ***¾
Shane Douglas stands by with Christian Cage before our main event. Christian says if you can’t trust him, go call his brother and Chris Jericho. He then realizes that’s a bad idea. He says ask the Christian Coalition who is sitting in the iMPACT zone if you can trust him. They cheer. Christian says he’s excited that he is in TNA and that he is his tag partner. They both can’t stand Monty or JJ. He says soon enough, this “mid-card comedy act” is going to save the TNA fans and win the NWA World title from Jarrett. Because hey, that’s how he rolls.
- Monty Brown & Jeff Jarrett (w/Gail Kim) vs. Christian Cage & Sting
The Orlando crowd is really happy to see Sting back. WAY more so than I expected, I must say that. Monty grabs a headlock to start and then gets shoved off into the ropes for a shoulderblock. Christian rolls him up for two. Monty comes back with blows and then takes Christian into his corner. Jarrett tags in and fires away on him. Christian runs the ropes and then puts on the brakes to mock Jarrett a little bit with the Jarrett strut. Jarrett gets mad and runs into a drop toe hold. Christian works the arm and tags in STING! Jarrett freaks out and heads over to his corner. Jarrett locks up anyways and Sting goes to a headlock. Sting gets shoved off into the ropes and he takes Jarrett down with a shoulderblock. Sting runs the ropes and then blocks a hiptoss into one of his own. A dropkick from Sting sends Jarrett rolling out to the floor to regroup with the heels. The crowd chants to Sting, “You’ve still got it!” Jarrett comes back in and drives a knee into Sting’s gut and fires back with a series of punches. Jarrett tries to take Sting’s head to the buckle, but he blocks that. Sting takes him into the ropes for a kick to the gut followed by a face slam. Monty comes in and takes the same. Christian made the blind tag and comes in for the CHRISTIAN SPLASH on Jarrett! There’s one for Monty! He runs back over to Jarrett and tries for the 10-count corner punch, but Gail Kim distracts the ref long enough for Jarrett to low blow him. Jarrett then tosses Christian out onto the floor. Gail, who is still on the apron, leaps off and connects with a RANA to Christian! WOW! Monty comes over and drops Christian chest-first onto the guardrail. Monty then tosses Christian back in. Jarrett whips Christian into the ropes for a nice dropkick. Now he does his strut as only he can do it. Jarrett tags in Monty, but Christian fights back with body blows. Monty comes back with a series of backbreakers and then a t-bone suplex. Monty covers for a few two counts. Jarrett tags in and delivers a suplex, but then misses the Bossman straddle. Christian can’t capitalize because Monty is right there with a clothesline from the apron. They do the bit where Christian makes the tag to Sting just Monty comes in to distract the ref from seeing the tag. Jarrett and Monty deliver a double-front suplex on Christian gut-first on the top rope. Monty covers, but only gets two. Monty hits a snap suplex and floats over into the pin for a near-fall. They both go up top, but Monty is shoved off and set up for a FROG SPLASH from Christian for a near-fall! “Eddie” chants go up! Monty grabs hold of Christian’s foot before he can make the tag. Meanwhile, Jarrett comes over to Sting and pulls him off the apron to prevent the tag. Christian gets to the corner, but there’s no Sting to be found. Jarrett brings two chairs in the ring as he and Monty try for a CONCHAIRTO, but Christian ducks just before the swing! DOUBLE DDT by Christian! HOT TAG to Sting! Sting destroys both Monty and Jarrett! STINGER SPLASH for Jarrett! Monty comes out of the corner, but Sting ducks the clothesline and Monty nails the ref instead. Monty gets dumped and Sting applies the SCORPION DEATHLOCK on Jarrett! Jarrett taps, but the ref is still down. Monty tries to break the hold, but Christian meets him at the pass. Monty ducks a clothesline and then delivers a fallaway slam on Christian ONTO Sting to break the hold! Sting’s all like, “WHAT THE CRAP?!” in Christian’s face. Monty tries to nail Sting in the back with the NWA title belt, but Christian pulls him out of harm’s way. Christian sends Monty out to ringside. Sting grabs the belt and they back into each other. Sting acts like he was nail whoever that was behind him, but then realizes it was Christian and doesn’t do it. Jarrett goes up top and then gets crotched. Monty comes in and he gets rammed into Jarrett’s balls. Monty gets tossed again! Here comes TEAM CANADA! Roode & Young fire away on Sting and Christian, but it does no good as they both take REVERSE DDT’s. Christian goes up to and LEAPS out onto Monty! Gail Kim distracts Sting until he turns around and takes the NWA belt to the face! That gets two! Monty tosses Christian in, and they go to work on the faces. Sting starts no-selling Jarrett’s punches and comes back with punches and chops of his own. STEREO CORNER SPLASHES on both Monty and Jarrett! They both miss, so Jarrett grabs the GEETAR to KABONG Christian. Sting is in with HIS weapon of choice, the baseball bat! As Jarrett rears back for the full-swing, Sting destroys the guitar using his bat! Monty gets dumped for like, the sixth time in this match. SCORPION DEATHDROP to Jarrett for the academic three-count. (15:08) Sting looked good and all, but it doesn’t mean this wasn’t an overbooked mess just like every TNA PPV main event. Can we not EVER have a clean finish? **
Final Thoughts: The good should’ve been longer and the bad should’ve been shorter. Nothing really stands out because nothing good was given enough time to matter. There was only two to three clean finishes (considering if you call the Joe/Daniels match a clean finish) on a nine-match PPV. That’s horrible. Unless you’re a Sting fan, feel free to skip this one.