August 3, 2004

WWF's Invasion of the Bodyslammers (1993)

We're going back to 1993 for this one. A very dark period for the WWF, but a huge year tape-wise as so many tapes were released that year.

First, we get an ad for WWF's King of the Ring of that year. Clips of Jack Tunney declaring Hogan still the champion. But as we all know, we would never see Hulk Hogan again after this event. And we wouldn't get a mention ever until 1998, when the attitude era began. I honestly don't like that Hogan's ego got the best of him, as many fans would have LOVED to see Hogan vs. Hart. That's what we call a money match. I'm sure Hart could pull Hogan to ****+.

Your host's are Lord Alfred Hayes, Slick, and Kamala. This is during the short time that Kamala was a face, as was Reverend Slick. I liked both during their run, and I thought Kamala was pretty over for being a token Raw and Wrestling Challenge jobber during that time. The joke is that Slick is trying to teach Kamala how to bowl. Kamala is screaming the whole way though. Slick says he has gotten 27 pefect games. He tries to give Kamala bowling shoes, but Kamala is scared of them so he chases Kamala around. Funnier than it sounds.

Yokozuna vs. Earthquake

BACKGROUND: Looks to be January 1993 here. Yoko was in the beginning of a huge push that would give him the title at Wrestlemania 9. Earthquake was heading down the crapper at this point, as he and Typhoon were used as singles jobbers.

Ross, Savage, and Heenan are here. Oh, this won't be good. Yoko bows with Fuji, and is wearing his white tights here. Earthquake does the usual jumping up and down, but Yoko won't move. Staredown. Yoko misses a charge and Quake with offense. Quake can't take him down with clotheslines, but a knee does the trick. A shoulderblock ends Quakes run, and Yoko uses a legdrop and a irish whip, which follows by an avalanche. Banzai Drop ends it at 3:42. Quick and to the point. *. Very decent, with no restholds and full of action.

Beverly Brothers vs. The Nasty Boys

BACKGROUND: Very late 1992-ish here. Both teams were nearing the end of their usefulness in the WWF, with the Beverly's of all teams, lasting longer: Until Summer 1993. The Nasties were fired at around a week before Wrestlemania 9, and that's too bad. I'd of loved to have seen both teams go at it, as they always had decent matches against each other, for some reason.

Brain: Ya know what I like about the Nasties? They look better than Mike McGurk (Or however her name was spelled...)

Sags and Beau begin with a lock-up. Beau begins the offense first. Shoulder block out of nowhere by Sags brings Knobbs in. Blake in. Sags in. Knobbs in. CHRIST! Knobbs with rights, as the Beverly's are falling apart: the usual with all of their matches. Sags picks up his arm and you know what's coming... Knobbs sticks Blake's head in Sag's armpit. And you thought Rikishi's stink face was horrible? Eww... Blake from behind with a take-down, and the Beverly's with a double team effort.

J.R.: I've always wondered where Parts Unknown was...
Brain: Under each arm of the Nasties.

Beau in. Snapmare gets 2. Blake in, and he produces a powerslam. Blake misses a top rope splash and Beau is now in. Beau with a LOW BLOW?!

Excuse me, what year is this again?

Back to the action. Knobbs is fighting back, but can't find Sags. Sags and Blake in. Backdrop and slams coming from Sags. The Beverly's blow the double team effort and Sags gets away. All 4 men are in the ring now, but the ref calls the bell for a Double DQ ay 6:45. DAMN YOU REF! It was getting good! **1/4. The usual **+ affair for these two.

Back with Kamala, who gets a bowling ball and is afraid of it.

The Undertaker vs. Razor Ramon

BACKGROUND: Looks like it's from possibly Later Winter 1993, as Ramon was building up face status.

Taker was in the middle of the horrible Giant Gonzalez feud that hopefully, will be never repeated. Undertaker basically dominates and Ramon decides to leave for a cheap count-out ay 5:04. Boring as hell. 1/4*

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Typhoon

BACKGROUND: Just copy and paste basically 75% of the background of the Earthquake match.

Please make it quick, PLEASE! Lockup, then a headlock. Both bump into each other quite a few times coming from the ropes. Powerslam by Typhoon, and showing how much of a genius he is, he doesen't cover. Of coruse, this means Bammer is now back with offense. Bammer blows and avalanche, which gets Typhoon to slam him and miss an elbow, which THEN prompts Bammer to miss a headbutt. Typhoon blows the irish whip, and lands on the turnbuckle. Bam Bam is now in control with the usual weak mid-1990's Bammer offense. Front face lock as Typhoon tries a suplex and fails. Now Bammer tries a suplex and nails him with it for 2. Headlock, and a rake in the eyes by Bammer. Typhoon with a forearm out of nowhere for 2. Slam, and Bam Bam gets a 2 count. Bam Bam tries to slam Typhoon and Typhoon falls on him. Clothesline. Typhoon misses an avalanche and Bammer with a headbutt from the top for the 3 at 7:27. DIDN'T SUCK! *1/4. Both guys were trying hard, and nothing was slow.

Back with Kamala, as Slick is showing him how to bowl, but Kamala doesen't bother to pay attention.

REPO CAM! Repo steals someone's video camera, so we can see him repo stuff. He repo's Bill Alfonso's (FONZ!) car, a bicycle (With a hilarious bit where Repo is riding away on the bike, and stops to yell at the camera guy.), another car, and a video store. He asks the clerk to play a Repo Man tape, and she does, which shows his old late 1991 promos. Hilarious. Barry Darsow had SO much fun during his Repo gimmick, and this shows it even more.

Wha? No Repo Man match to follow up?

Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels

Ahh, now I won't complain.

BACKGROUND: This is from Summer 1992, and Bret is still the I-C champion. Shawn was beginning a push that would lead him to main event Survivor Series 92, and to be a I-C champion. Bret about to job to the Bulldog at Summerslam.

Lockup, and an armdrag by HBK. Both start trading arm holds. Shawn is knocked outside, and gets distracted by some fans so Bret can attack him. Clothesline for 2. Armbar. Michaels connects with a knee lift from a mistake by Bret. Irish Whip sends Hart to the buckle. Stomps and a chokehold. Sherri gets a slap on Hart for good measure and Shawn with a knee for 2. YES! ANOTHER ARMDRAG BABAY!1111 Hitman fights back, but Shawn with a crescent kick and he tries the lame side suplex finisher he had. Bret fights out of it though, and nails Shawn with a clothesline that sends Shawn over. 3 OF THE 5 MOVES OF DOOM for 2. Sleeperhold, and Bret is now out of the ring and hits the guardrail and loses by count-out at 8:50. Shawn thinks he won the belt. There are better Hart vs. Shawn matches out there. ***1/4. Post match sees Bret waffle Shawn with the belt.

Back with Kamala, who still isn't paying attention.

Kamala vs. Doink

BACKGROUND: Kamala made a face turn, by ditching Kimchee and Whippleman for Slick, in his preacher mode. He still sucks. This is evil Doink mode, played by Matt Bourne, which was a masterful gimmick.

I love heel Doink. He has a box: A present box. Doink taunts Kamala with the box, and does a sneak attack. Weak offense like and armbar and a clothesline. Kamala gets in control with a crescent kick and chops. A weak chop sends Doink flying. The race is on! Doink gives the box to Kamala, and Kamala gets counted out while opening the box at 3:21. We'll be nice and go DUD. Turns out the box is EMPTY. See what I mean about how good of a heel Doink was? Post match has an angry Kamala kick Doink around and beat his ass. He even gets a splash in for good measure.

Papa Shango vs. The Undertaker

BACKGROUND: Early 1993 here, as Shango was a useless Superstars wrestler, while Taker was in the middle of a feud with Giant Gonzalez.

Oh god. Staredown and Shango and Taker trade chokes. Big boot by Taker. Top rope clothesline, and a irish whip. Slam. Taker misses an elbow and Shango nails him with fire in the face. Shango dominates now and sends Taker to the steps. More Shango stuff. Slam, but Taker is back up. 2 more powerslams and Taker is still going up. Shango measures him, and Taker comes back with a BEAUTIFUL top rope clothesline for the 3 at 6:29. -*. Plus 1/4* for a beautiful top rope clothesline, so the final rating of the match is -3/4*.

Back to Kamala. Slick is still trying to teach him how to throw correctly, but Kamala still does not care. He actually tries, but goes to close to the pins in a very funny moment.

15 Man Battle Royale

You got Berzerker, Koko B. Ware, Tatanka, Bob Backlund, Shawn Michaels, Razor Ramon, Typhoon, Kim Chee, Kamala, El Matador, Terry Taylor, Owen Hart, Iron Mike Sharpe, Skinner, Damien Demento. Only thing notable is seeing Kamala chase Kim Chee in the stands, and it then shows Kamala chase Kim Chee through the cheap seats, funny stuff. This is from Raw, and Razor wins because Giant Gonzalez interferes and eliminates both Tito and Tatanka. Lame.

Tatanka vs. Repo Man

BACKGROUND: Repo was on his way out, and to WCW where he ruined himself. Tatanka is still undefeated at this point, and the fans still care about him. Lockup. Kick, Repo blows an armdrag. Dropkick by Tatanka, and Repo takes a break on the outside. Armbar. Shoulderblock, and other weak offense, Roll-up by T-T-T-Tatanka for 2. Armbar. More lame offense as the crowd (As do I) goes apathetic. Tatanka wins. Wee. 1/4*. So damn boring.

Back to Kamala, who tries to throw the bowling ball, but throws it backwards.

Ric Flair vs. Mr. Perfect

BACKGROUND: Calm down there. This isn't the "Loser leaves town" match from Raw. It's from a house show in early 1993.

Flair acts all cocky, and both slap each-other. Shoving match, lock-up, and slapping match again. This just shows how HOT this feud was. The crowd is fucking JACKED. Flair chops, and rams Curt to the turnbuckle. Dropkick, kneedrop, and more Flair offense. Perfect with a powerslam outta' nowhere for 2. Flair then chops (Woooooo!), and gets Curt in a figure four. Perfect turns it around, and Flair gets the ropes. But, they keep going back and forth, and Flair finally gets out of the figure four. Flair and Perfect trade fists and Perfect tries to get out of the corner. Perfect fights back, and nails a back bodydrop with gets a Flair flop! Punch by perfect, and a Perfectplex out of nowhere finishes it at 10:51. ***1/2. Needed to be a bit longer.

Slick has given up on Kamala, but Kamala bowls a strike and they celebrate. Alfred says good-bye.

But WWF Global Warfare out August on Coliseum Video, join the fan club, and get some IcoPro.

End of tape.

Overall: Great little 2 hour tape. Nothing was too bad besides Shango vs. Taker, Repo vs. Tatanka, and the lame battle royale finish. The Kamala stuff is pretty funny sometimes, and Perfect vs. Flair and Shawn vs. Bret are good matches.


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