February 4, 2009
Mike Abitabile

Monday Nitro
MGM Grand Garden Arena, Las Vegas, Nevada

So here we are. The Nitro that WCW has been hyping since late March has finally arrived with the promise of an “impact player in our industry” debuting with the company tonight. Who will it be, and perhaps more importantly, will this person side with WCW or the nWo? Let’s find out.

After the theme song plays, Tony welcomes us to the entertainment capital of the world. Mike and Larry are with him and we go right to the ring. Mean Gene brings out the Nature Boy! Flair’s music all of a sudden turns to bag pipes and he brings out two gorgeous ladies carrying a mannequin dressed as Roddy Piper. The girls screw up as the kilt falls off the mannequin, as does its arm. Not too bright if I may say so myself. The first lady asks Gene why they call him “Hot Rod” because he is not hot. The fans chant “Roddy” and Flair mocks them. Flair says Piper can’t hang with these ladies. Mean Gene asks the lady if he is truly the sixty minute man and our airhead answers “more like thirty seconds!” He meant Flair you floozy, not Piper! This segment is dying a horrible death, even by my standards. Flair and the girls “dance” all over the kilt and we thankfully go to the booth. Tony says Flair is ready for Piper at the Bash at the Beach and Mike agrees.

Cruiserweight Title Match: Champion Chris Jericho vs. Juventud Guerrera
Well it looks like Easy E really was psychic by assuming something embarrassing would happen to the nWo at Saturday Nitro because Chris Jericho defeated Syxx to win the cruiserweight belt, thus justifying his decision to keep the cameras away from the show. These two lock up and Jericho works over the arm. Juvy spins out and they trade reversals as the announcers go silent. My assumption would be some Benoit/Sullivan talk that was edited out on 24/7. Jericho gets a belly to back takedown then applies a surfboard type maneuver. Juventud breaks it then lands a head scissor takedown then tries to jump off the top rope but slips. Jericho back drop suplexes him in response. He follows up with a regular suplex, which gets a two count. Jericho stretches Juvy’s back then ties him to the tree of woe and runs in with a baseball slide dropkick to the face. The announcers point out Jericho is using a more methodical pace here and not capitalizing on his offense, instead being lacksidasical. Sounds like the sounds for a heel turn are being planted. Jericho misses a clothesline but gets kicked in the midsection. Juvy goes up for a springboard move off the top but again slips. Ugh. Jericho gets tossed from the ring allowing Juvy to hit a huge plancha over the top. He throws Jericho back in and goes for the 450 splash, which hits, but only gets two. Jericho hits the multiple powerbombs as the fans erupt. The moves only get a two though. Jericho puts Juvy on the top turnbuckle and hits a HUGE SUPER FRANKENSTEINER while they were both standing on the top rope! Wow. Jericho then applies the Boston crab for the submission win.

After the match, Gene interviews Chris Jericho and congratulates him on beating Syxx and taking a title back to WCW. Syxx comes down to interrupt this though and says Jericho beat nothing on Saturday until he went back to his hotel room. Zing! The nWo still thinks Syxx is the cruiserweight champion and he says he’ll give Jericho another shot at the belt right now, and then slugs Jericho! They brawl as we go to break. As we return, security is still trying to pull them apart.

Now Gene is in the aisle with Alex Wright. Alex says it’s about time someone interviewed him. He says WCW held him down for three years and referees have been biased against him. Lex Luger has nothing on his body! Gene sends it back to the booth.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Dean Malenko
As Dean is making his way down the aisle, Eddie jumps him from behind, and it’s on like Donkey Kong. He puts the boots to Dean in the aisle as the referee tries to get them to go to the ring. Eddie throws Dean into the steel steps on their way there, then finally throws him into the ring. Tenay says a lot of people think they know Eddie Guerrero but he knows the real Eddie. The one who teamed with the late Art Barr to form the most despised team in the history of lucha libre. Thanks for just telling us this now, Mike. Way to keep it to yourself for so long. Eddie takes Dean down with a stiff clothesline then steps on his face and follows up with a snap suplex and a leg lariat. Eddie goes up top but Dean crotches him and throws him off the top. Eddie gets dropped face first on the top turnbuckle then Dean hits a side suplex. Now Dean hits his own leg lariat and gets two. Dean hits a STIFF powerbomb then tells Eddie what he thinks of him. All of a sudden, Chavo Jr. makes his way to ringside and seems to be cheering for Eddie. Dean goes to apply the Texas Cloverleaf but then goes after Chavo, who jumped up on the apron. Eddie gets up and shoves Dean into Chavo then hits a brainbuster and the frog splash to get the win! Tony wants to know if Eddie ran Dean into Chavo on accident or on purpose. Eddie goes to check on Chavo and they walk out together, though Chavo looks confused.

Gene is in the aisle with Rey Mysterio, Jr. Rey Rey has had enough of Kevin Nash and the Wolfpac. Rey wants to fight Kevin Nash tonight. Gene thinks he is insane. Kevin Nash comes out to answer the challenge. He offers to perform an autopsy tonight and accepts. Rey says he isn’t afraid.

Eric Bischoff rides down the aisle on an nWo motorcycle. He brings out Hollywood Hogan to a pretty good pop. Hogan presents the title belt to Bischoff and they go to the ring. Hogan enjoyed beating up the Giant and Lex Luger recently. Hogan says he wants Scott Hall, Kevin Nash and Randy Savage to fight Luger, the Giant and “DDPP” tonight. Hollywood then puts over Nash and says he’s going to destroy Rey Mysterio before the six man. Hogan poses for the fans and we go to break.

TV Title Match: Champion Steven Regal vs. Hector Garza
Regal goes to work on the arm but Hector spins out. They trade reversals until Hector takes Regal down with a shoulder block but Regal regains control with a thumb to the eye. He goes to work on Garza in the corner then moves out of the way of a body press. Garza hits a dropkick sending Regal to the floor. He goes up to for his corkscrew plancha and just like last week, Garza didn’t connect very well and hits the ground very hard. Garza throws Regal in then hits a missile dropkick off the top rope then goes for an Asai moonsault but Regal got the knees up and locks in the Regal Stretch to retain the title by submission.

We are shown a vignette focusing on Dennis Rodman and Hollywood Hogan, who will be facing Lex Luger and the Giant at the Bash at the Beach. We again go back to Mean Gene, in the aisle, who brings out the Steiner Brothers. Gene points out they are the number one contenders for the tag titles. Scott wants the shot and Rick says they aren’t leaving until they get the match. This brings out The Wolfpac, Buff, Norton, Vincent and Masa Hiro Chono. Hall calls them crybabies but produces a contract. Hall says they are the reason everyone is here and watching at home. Gene pulls out a pen and the Steiners sign the contract without reading it. Well, no one ever said they were the smartest dogs in the yard. And just like that, Hall points out that the Steiners agreed to a contract stating they must fight and beat Chono and Muta before getting their title shot.

Psychosis vs. Super Calo
Sonny Onoo is with Psychosis. Psychosis slides out of the ring after an arm drag then comes back in and works on Calo’s arm. He flips out then hits a back elbow. Psychosis again slides out then moves as Calo goes for a baseball slide. Onoo hits some kicks to Calo behind the referee’s back then Psychosis throws him back in. Calo gets a surprise power slam out of nowhere but gets clotheslined and kicked out of the ring. Psychosis hits his own baseball slide that connects then launches himself off the top rope but Calo moves and Psychosis hits the guard rail hard! Calo tries to suplex Psychosis back in but Onoo pulls his leg out from under him, allowing Psychosis the opportunity to land on Calo and get the win. After the match, Calo attacks Psychosis until La Parka comes out and destroys a chair over his back. Now Juventud comes out and makes the save.

Mortis and Wrath vs. High Voltage
James Vandenberg brings out his oddities while Bobby Heenan joins Tony and Mike for commentary during hour number two. Mortis and Wrath attack to start the match and destroy High Voltage. Wrath goes up top and launches himself with a huge clothesline on Kaos then follows up with a huge scissor kick. Mortis hits a top rope rocker dropper on Rage but then Glacier and Ernest Miller come to ringside. Glacier distracts Wrath, and the referee, as Ernest Miller comes in and hits the Feliner kick on Mortis as he was setting up the Flatliner. This allows Rage the chance to make the pin and get the upset win! After the match, Vandenberg told the camera he was not happy with Glacier.

Before we go to break, we go to the parking lot where a white limousine has arrived. Tony thinks it’s the impact player as Brain points out the nWo always drives black limos. The door opens a little then closes again. Brain tells the cameraman to go open the door as we finally go to break.

Lee Marshall is on the Road with 1-800-Collect. Lee is in Memphis, Tennessee, where Nitro will be next week. Lee listened to a lot of blues CD’s while in Memphis but can’t find anything by “Blow Hard Hennan and the Weasels.”

We cut to ringside to see Raven sitting in the crowd. Tenay says he has been a champion in many organizations (including the one that was signing your paychecks at the time, Tenay). Brain wonders if he came out of the white limo. Tony says he doesn’t work for WCW. The announcers try and figure out if he is the impact player. How many WCW announcers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

US Title Match: Champion Jeff Jarrett vs. Konan
Still one N for Konan. Jarrett is by himself – no Horsemen and no Debra. Konan goes right after Jarrett but gets hiptossed for his troubles. Jarrett follows up with a clothesline then kicks away at Konan. Konan goes for the leg then kicks Jarrett in the face. Jeff counters though with a DDT then slams Konan’s head into the top turnbuckle. Tony references a match that was edited from this 24/7 broadcast which happened earlier in the night – Flair, Mongo and Benoit defeating Buff Bagwell, Scott Norton and Masa Chono. Guess why they cut it! Jarrett pounds on Konan in the corner but gets hit with a back elbow then has his head slammed into the ground. Konan locks on a submission move and twists Jarrett around like a pretzel. He fights to his feet but Konan takes him down with a clothesline. Jarrett rakes the eyes then goes to work on the leg of Konan. All of a sudden, the Horsemen head down the aisle (yes, even the guy who we aren’t allowed to reference). When he sees them, Konan spits at Ric Flair and Jarrett attacks him from behind. He locks on the figure four but Konan turns itover. Jeff turns it back to the other way and Flair helps Jarrett with extra leverage to get the win and retain the US title by submission. The announcers conclude that everything is well in Horsemen land as Flair and Jarrett strut together in the ring.

Gene comes in to talk to the Horsemen. Jeff Jarrett says everything is fine. Jarrett puts over Flair big time. Flair puts over Jarrett put tells him he is no longer a Horsemen! Debra tells Jeff he is as welcome as a stunk at a party. Jarrett says Ric is jealous of him and promises to be the one to put him out to pasture. Jarrett takes his belt and leaves while the Horsemen just watch. They should have beaten him down.

Highlights of the problems between Nash and Rey are shown. On July 29, 1996, Nash threw Rey head first into a production truck in what became known as “The Lawn Dart Incident.” On April 21 of this year, Nash power bombed Rey on Nitro. More has happened recently, but they don’t show any of it.

Kevin Nash vs. Rey Mysterio, Jr.
Nash is about two times the weight of Rey and Mysterio’s eyes are basically up to Nash’s pectoral region. Rey rushes in with a dropkick off the top then hits three more regular ones. Rey hits a summersault off the top to knock Nash off his feet and gets a two. Rey goes for a spinning move but Nash just catches him and drops him hard across his knee with an inverted atomic drop. Nash absolutely launches Rey across the ring. Nash finally hits a huge Jackknife power bomb on Rey then puts his foot on his chest for the win. After the bell, Nash hits two more Jackknife powerbombs and the referee before Konan makes an appearance. He heads to the ring as Tenay points out Konan and Rey trained together in Mexico. Nash leaves as Konan stands over Rey then locks on a leg submission as Rey screams in pain. Has Konan joined the nWo?

As we return from break, Rey is being loaded on a stretcher and taken out of the arena. Mike Tenay has gone over to Raven and has brought a microphone. Tenay wants to know why Raven is here. He wants to know if he is here to watch the show or if he is here to be DDP’s partner at the Bash at the Beach. Raven doesn’t answer any of his questions and pushes Tenay away.

Scott Hall Kevin Nash and “Macho Man” Randy Savage vs. Diamond Dallas Page, Lex Luger and The Giant
Liz is with the nWo (and Nash has a toupee on over his hair during the entrance). Kimberly comes out with Page. Luger, Giant and DDP strategize before heading to the ring. DDP, Lex and Giant circle the ring as we take a commercial break. As we return, still nothing has happened as team WCW tries to enter the ring but the nWo keeps stopping them. Finally, it all breaks down as all six men brawl. DDP gets his hands on Randy Savage while Giant beats up Nash. Hall works over Luger on the other side of the ring and Nash gains control against Giant. Page continues to beat on Savage until he hits a low blow on DDP and chokes him over the bottom rope. This resembles a Texas tornado match as there are no tags and six men just attacking each other. Giant has both Outsiders by himself and hits a double head butt! He charges them but they dump him over the top rope. All of a sudden, Hollywood Hogan runs out and hits the Giant over the back with the title belt. DDP hits the Diamond Cutter on Savage as Hogan now hits Luger with the title belt. DDP tries to fight off Nash and Savage but the numbers game catches up to him.

Now various other nWo members are out to beat up team WCW. Savage hits the big elbow drop off the top right to the bad ribs of DDP. This match is officially a no contest as it never even got started. Savage hits another elbow as Sting arrives in the crowd. Well, it’s some guy dressed as Sting as I am the only one to realize his hair is too short to be Sting. Savage hits another elbow drop on DDP. And now, the real Sting drops from the ceiling! Hogan backpedals and the nWo bails! And now, Curt Hennig appears and walks down the entrance ramp to the ring! All of a sudden, Raven jumps the guard rail and stands at ringside. Everyone looks around puzzled and…. we’re out of time!

Next week, we’ll see if we can get some answers as the arrival of our impact player(s) has only given us more questions. Plus, we inch closer to the Bash at the Beach.

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