February 4, 2010
The Powerdriver Review
Monday Night RAW – February 1, 2010
Coming off what many are calling the best Royal Rumble ever, I think it was in the top three but not the best, we’re now officially on the ‘Road to Wrestlemania’. Last night at the Royal Rumble Edge made a triumphant return and won the Rumble eliminating John Cena. In the match we also had Miz and MVP continue their rivalry, plus Shawn Michaels eliminated Triple H, but was later eliminated by Batista. This denied Shawn Michaels of his number one contender status he wanted so bad, and means he will not face Undertaker at Wrestlemania. Also last night Randy Orton lost his chance to win the title from Sheamus due to Cody Rhodes, this caused the viper to strike out at his team. Orton beat the daylights out of Cody and Ted DiBiase, have we reached the end of Legacy? Who will Edge choose to face at Wrestlemania? Can Triple H forgive Shawn for eliminating him? Where does this leave Shawn for Wrestlemania? What will happen tonight when Bret Hart confronts Vince McMahon about kicking him last month? What will William Shatner do tonight on RAW? Who will win the useless Diva’s title, Gail Kim or Maryse (Maryse)? All these questions may be answered tonight on Monday Night RAW!!!
We open this week with the winner of the 2010 Royal Rumble, The ‘Rated R Superstar’ Edge! He comes out to a load ovation, as Cole says no surprise was bigger than Edge’s return last night, as he eliminated his former tag partner Chris Jericho. Let’s hope he doesn’t challenge former partner Christian for the ECW title at Wrestlemania, which would be the worst they could do. Edge is soaking in the cheers of this huge crowd, and says “I’m back”, he says it feels good to be back and will be in the main event of Wrestlemania. Edge talks about winning the tag titles with Chris Jericho, and getting injured, the doctors told him May or June, maybe even never. He says he was sitting home watching the Slammy Awards, and Jericho thanking him for getting injured so could team with Big Show. Edge says watching it the room got very silent, not because Dennis Miller bombed as guest host, but because he made a vow not to miss a third Wrestlemania due to injury. Edge says he is the ultimate opportunist and says he promised to prove the doctors wrong, and to rehab harder than he ever has, and promised to enter the Rumble and win it. Seven weeks after the Slammy Awards, Jericho has his Slammy, his Mugshot on TMZ, but Edge has his ticket to Wrestlemania. Edge continues by saying two years ago he found Undertaker at Wrestlemania and lost, but this year unlike Shawn Michaels if he wants the Dead man he can have him. He says is it better to go after the man who is 17-0 at Mania, or the man who’s never been to Wrestlemania. He can make a decision now, or wait till after the next PPV, either way this year the Rated R Superstar will headline Wrestlemania! As Edge’s music plays, suddenly out comes the Champion, Sheamus, also known as the paper champion. Has Sheamus won a match clean since winning the title? Sheamus gets in the ring, as Edge looks at him, and Sheamus says Edge’s isn’t back five seconds and he’s mouthing off, a lot has changed since Edge left. Edge says Raw has changed; it’s been taken over by an evil Ronald McDonald, Sheamus tells to watch himself. Sheamus says he’s never competed at Wrestlemania, but he did something Edge couldn’t do, he beat John Cena. Edge says he’s made a career out of beating John Cena and he’s beaten Randy Orton as well. Sheamus says that was a long time ago, and he will walk out of the Elimination Chamber as champ and won’t break a sweat beating Edge. Sheamus tells Edge to run to Smackdown so he doesn’t ruin Edge’s Royal Rumble moment, as Edge gets in his face. Sheamus nails Edge with the microphone and then clotheslines him down. Edge pulls himself up, and avoids the pumpkick; Edge takes Sheamus down and pummels him. Edge spears Sheamus down hard and then stands over the fallen champion. That was a hell of a way to start RAW this week, very cool! Let’s hope the rest of the show can be as good. We now get a promo for the Elimination Chamber PPV, and even hear Joey Styles and Jim Ross’ voices! Six men go in and only one gets to survive, as we know see John Cena walking backstage as Jerry Lawler says we will have all the qualifying matches tonight!
1. John Cena v. Cody Rhodes. Cody starts out quick on Cena, with kicks and punches and rams Cena in the corner. Cena starts to fight back, but Cody with a quick side Russian legsweep, and continues to punch Cena in the head. Cody with a nice spinning neck breaker, and follows with a kneedrop to the head and gets a near fall. Cody goes for another knee, but Cena moves and comes back with a pair of shoulderblocks. Cena goes for the Suplex, but Cody slides out and rolls Cena up, but Cena kicks out and nails the belly to back Suplex. Cena follows up with the fist drop, and quickly goes for the FU, but Cody blocks and nails a front layout Suplex, ala One Man Gang for a near fall. Rhodes climbs the ropes and hits a nice moonsault, as Lawler calls him Orton, Cena caught running in the corner, but catches Cody in the FU for the win. 2/5 all the points go to Cody as he dominated the match, but of course Cena gets one move and wins. People wonder why so many fans hate Cena, this is the reason. He gets pummeled the whole match, nails one move and wins. What a load of crap, as Cody should’ve got his opportunity to headline. Cena’s been on top long enough, and needs to step away for awhile.
We now get to see the original Montreal Screwjob, and from there Vince walking the hallways, as Josh asks if Vince saw Bret tonight. Vince says he has not, and doubts Bret will even show up, as enters his dressing room. Vince turns around, and starts to yell at someone in the room; it’s not going to be Bret of course. I was right, it’s William Shatner, Shatner says as a fellow Canadian and a human being he can’t wait to see Bret Hart embarrass Vince tonight.
2. Jack Swagger v. Triple H. Seriously can they make these outcomes more obvious? So tonight’s theme is bury the young and push the same old shit, I get it now. This is going another quick squash of course, as I assume Shawn, Orton and maybe DiBiase get the other three spots, unless I forgot someone. Michael Cole immediately starts to kiss Triple H’s ass as he says Triple H is the reason all these people are there. Swagger with a quick go behind, takes HHH down and rides around the ring, but HHH grabs the ropes. Swagger does his vintage pushups, and gets in HHH’s face. HHH with a pair of uppercuts, then the high knee and clotheslines Swagger over the top as we go to commercial. We come back and Swagger gets caught running in, but avoids the clothesline and nails DDT, as Swagger gets a near fall. Swagger drops a pair of elbows, then a legdrop. Swagger gives Triple H a wedgie and locks in the abdominal stretch, but Triple H counters out and tosses Swagger out again. Triple H follows, but Swagger rams HHH into the ring, and both men back in. Swagger with a nice powerslam on the Game, as the ref counts slowly and HHH kicks out. Swagger with a rear chinlock, and Triple H powers out of it, but Swagger pops the Game and knocks him down. Swagger goes for the bouncy elbow, but Triple H gets the knees up and both men are down. Triple H unloads on Swagger and nails the facebuster for a near fall. Can’t have a pin until we see the Pedigree, it’s an unwritten rule, as Triple H nails the spinebuster for two. Triple H goes for the Pedigree, but Swagger backdrops the Game down, and nails the Vader Splash and should’ve won there, but of course Triple H kicks out. Swagger with a nice belly to belly for a near fall. Swagger drives a shoulder into the Game and pulls him out of the corner. Triple H just casually nails a Pedigree and wins. 2/5 once again all credit goes to Swagger who carried Triple H the whole match. Like I said these matches are so easy to see who’s going to win. What next Shawn v. Chavo? Orton v. Primo? Seriously, these are so obvious it’s killing the show.
Well, OK, Shawn v. Orton, that might save the show, as we now get a video for Shatner. Shatner is singing the entrance themes, this is good. He’s doing Shawn’s theme, and now Cena’s, this may be the highlight of the night. Shatner’s now singing Rey’s theme, that’s the closest I’ve come to understanding it. Now he’s doing the Game’s music, now that’s a CD they should release. We now see Shawn in the back all sad and puppy dog faced, as Hunter comes in along with Hornswoggle, damn I thought he was gone. HHH asks Shawn about last night when Shawn eliminated him, and says he would’ve never done that, and then he laughs and says he would if he had the chance. Shawn says it wasn’t supposed to happen that way, he was supposed to win and end the streak, and HHH says he’s obsessed and went crazy last night. HHH says Shawn needs to get in the chamber, and they will dominate and one will walk out champ. HHH says he wants to go to Wrestlemania and face Shawn for the belt, but Shawn needs to beat Orton. Shawn just walks out of the dressing room.
3. Randy Orton v. Shawn Michaels. They quickly lock up, and Orton overpowers Shawn into the corner. The ref pulls Orton back, as he stares at Shawn, who quickly locks up with Orton. Orton gets Shawn in the corner, and pulls Orton out again, but Orton gets right in Shawn’s face and swings at him, but Shawn moves and whips Orton in but reversed. Shawn comes back with a neckbreaker and stomps Orton, Shawn goes for the kick, and Orton bails out. Shawn follows, and Orton quickly back in and catches Shawn. Orton goes for the DDT but Shawn slides out and pulls Orton out. Orton back in and Shawn off the top with a crossbody for a near fall, he then whips Orton in the corner, but reversed and Shawn goes head over heels. Orton nails the backbreaker on Shawn, and then stomps the midsection of HBK. Shawn slowly gets up, and Orton knocks him down, then Shawn gets back up and Orton with a dropkick for a near fall. Orton hammers Shawn in the chest, and goes to a chinlock on Shawn, who struggles to get free. Shawn punches his way out, but Orton nails a knee to Shawn and sets him on the top rope. Orton goes for a superplex, but Shawn counters and knocks Orton off the ropes, but Orton punches Shawn and right back up. Shawn continues to fights Orton off, and knocks him down. Shawn follows with the elbow drop on Orton, and readies for Sweet Chin Music. Shawn misses the kick, and Orton goes for RKO, countered into two inverted atomic drops. Orton whips Shawn in, and Shawn comes back with the flying forearm, and goes for the nip up, but Orton catches him and rolls Shawn up for the surprise win. 3/5 not a good match, but better then the first two matches. I like when the win comes out of nowhere, not every match needs to end with a big finishing move. In the ring Shawn is breaking down again, as the ref was smart enough to run. Shawn rips off the D-X wristbands, and leaves the ring, storming down the aisle. Backstage Randy Orton runs into Ted DiBiase, who congratulates him on the win and apologizes for last night. Orton gets right in his face and walks away without saying a word.
4. Mark Henry v. Ted DiBiase. This should be interesting, as they quickly lock up and Henry powers down Ted. Ted with a side headlock, and Henry shoves him in and runs over Ted, then clotheslines him to the floor. Henry follows and Ted grabs Mark’s arm and slams it into the post twice, but Henry back with a headbutt. Ted with a drop toe hold rams Henry into the steps and continues to work over the arm of Henry as both men are back in. Mark whips Ted in, and runs him over then a headbutt. Henry caught coming in the corner and Ted climbs the ropes. Henry catches Ted diving down, but Ted slides out of the ring. Ted goes for Dream Street, but Henry powers out and misses another corner charge. Ted with a hammerlock drop for a win! 2.5/5 an ok match and the right guy won as Ted is in the Chamber! Another match that ended suddenly, which is nice to see. So far in is Sheamus, HHH, Cena, Orton & Ted, so with one slot left, who will it be? I’d think either Big Show or Kofi, as we suddenly get the split screen showing those two.
Michael Cole reports on the passing of Jack Brisco, as we get the graphic for Brisco and a career retrospective. That was classy and nice to see, he was a great wrestler in his time.
We now go backstage to Kelly and Gail, as Maryse walks in and says she’s looking forward to the match tonight. Maryse says Michelle’s crap is embarrassing and she doesn’t want to do that, and just wants a good match. Maryse says something in French to Gail, who should’ve understood a little of it, considering she’s from Toronto. We get stuck learning French, she should understand some of that.
Anyways back to Miz and Big Show who are talking about Show winning the Chamber, as they wait for TJ Hooker to arrive. Show asks if he called him that, and Miz asks should I call him Captain Kirk. The door opens and instead of Shatner, it’s CM Punk, Luke Gallows and Serena. Miz asks what they want, and Punk say they were robbed of their title shot against DX and says they want they deserve. Miz says they’re not on the show anyways, as Shatner walks in and asks what the problem is. Punk says we deserve the shot and to give it to us, Miz says they don’t belong on RAW and they want the shot, Shatner says that’s a dilemma and Show asks what will you do about it. Shatner climbs on the chair and says next week, Straight Edge Society v. Big Show and Miz v. D-X for the tag titles. Shatner then gets a cheap plug in, as everyone leaves. Over to Triple H and Shawn, as Triple H tells Shawn to get over it and move on as he says Shawn is spiraling down. Shawn won’t look at HHH, as he says Shawn is Mr. Wrestlemania and he can face anyone at Wrestlemania. Shawn finally looks up and says not for me and walks out.
5. Big Show v. Kofi Kingston. I’m assuming that Kofi wins this one, and maybe will actually get in the Chamber this time. Michael Cole mentions Kofi getting ambushed, but doesn’t mention it was Edge that did it, nice revisionist history. Kofi uses his speed to avoid Show, but no dice, as Show hammers Kofi and headbutts him down, as Miz joins Lawler and Cole at ringside. Show continues to pummel Kofi who tries to fight his way back, but Show just tosses Kingston, as Miz says they will run RAW. Show misses a run at Kofi and crotches the ropes, and Kofi kicks Show to the floor as we go to commercial. We come back and Show is back on Kingston. I’d like to see a match between Jericho and Miz still, as they fight for custody of Big Show. Just saying is all. Show with a rear chinlock, and Kofi fights out with a jawbreaker, but Show headbutts Kofi and sends him out. Miz gets up and stands over Kingston, and MVP comes out of the crowd and takes it to Miz. MVP chases Miz out of the ringside area, as Show goes back after Kingston and lifts him to the apron. Kofi stuns Show and climbs the ropes, but falls off!!! Kingston pulls himself up and hits a dropkick, and then a second one, a third takes the knees out and a fourth to the head of Show. Kofi nails the Boom Drop for a near fall. Show in the corner, and Kofi dives into the corner, but Show catches him by the throat. Kofi gets a thumb in the eye of Show, who swings and Kofi ducks and down goes the ref. Show tosses Kingston to the floor and checks on the ref, who King declares dead. Show waves to the back for another ref, as he pleads his case, and the bell rings. 1.5/5 not a good match at all, best part was Kofi falling off the top. Kofi wins by DQ, as Show keeps apologizing to the ref, as he says it was an accident. Show has a good point, as he was blinded by Kingston, as they load the ref on a stretcher and Show kicks the steps. So next week’s guest host is some NASCAR driver, yippee. Who cares, seriously? Hopefully Straight Edge Society wins the tag titles.
Jerry Lawler is in the ring, and he introduces the guest host of Monday Night RAW. Not bad twenty minutes left of the show as Shatner comes out to the ring, with the Bella Twins of course. Shatner says he has had a lot of fun, and has the honor of introducing Bret “The Hitman” Hart. Bret comes out and shakes William’s hand, as he leaves, and Bret says he’s had a month to think about what happened. Bret says he came here for the right reasons, and it took him twelve years to make peace, and people told him he was crazy and people warned him about Vince. Bret says he was naïve to trust Vince, and he admits he was wrong, but he didn’t come tonight to make peace or closure, he came to talk to Vince face to face. Bret tells Vince to get his ass down there now, or he’s bringing a camera crew back there now. Vince finally comes out, dancing to his music, as he pretends to not notice Bret; Vince does his vintage pickle in the ass walk to the ring. Vince gets in the ring and says he has things to get off his chest, but first says he doesn’t regret anything he said or did to Bret. Bret congratulates Vince as that’s the first honest thing he has said to Bret, and tells him he’s the greatest liar ever. Bret says Vince couldn’t lace up his father’s jockstrap, as he says Cena called him pathetic, and Bret says he knows pathetic. Bret says eight years ago he had a stroke and was in a wheelchair, but found the courage to pull himself up and got out of the wheelchair. Bret says he vowed to never feel pathetic again, but then he came to RAW for the right reasons, and Bret kicked him and left him in the ring feeling pathetic and has a problem with that. Bret continues by saying he worked for fourteen years for Vince, and says he believed one day Vince would appreciate it, but now he knows Vince doesn’t. Bret mentions how Vince described him as chewing gum that lost flavor, but he can kick Vince’s ass here and now. Vince starts mocking Bret Hart’s nicknames, as he calls the best there is one a crock. Vince says he has one other nickname, a Canadian Hero, which makes Vince retch and says Bret’s not a hero. Vince says Bret’s not a hero to anyone, and doesn’t understand what people see in Bret. Vince calls Bret pathetic and has zero personality and if wasn’t for his opponents Bret would be a footnote in the middle of the card. Vince says Bret has no charisma, no command over the English language, a hound dog face, stringy hair and dresses like a hobo. Bret asks if he is finished, and Vince continues by saying Bret deserved to be screwed and mention about nominating Stu Hart for the Hall of Fame. Vince says that won’t happen because he doesn’t deserve it. Bret finally kicks Vince and starts to pummel Vince in the head, then goes for the sharpshooter. Suddenly out of nowhere comes Batista who kicks Bret and starts to hammer the Hitman, as Vince gets back up. The crowd is screaming for Cena, as Batista holds Bret up for Vince who slaps Bret in the face and then spits on Bret.
1. John Cena beat Cody Rhodes 2/5
2. Triple H crushed Jack Swagger 2/5
3. Randy Orton beat Shawn Michaels 3/5
4. Ted DiBiase beat Mark Henry 2.5/5
5. Kofi Kingston beat Big Show by DQ 1.5/5
That was something. The matches basically sucked badly this week, but the Edge promo and the Bret/Vince stuff were good. So the match at the PPV will be Sheamus v. John Cena v. Triple H v. Randy Orton v. Ted DiBiase v. Kofi Kingston. That doesn’t impress me very much, as I can see HHH walking out with the title. How much better would it have been if it was Sheamus v. Jack Swagger v. Miz v. Kofi Kingston v. Ted DiBiase v. Cody Rhodes? That would’ve given all the young guys a great main event, and a much better more competitive show. Those first two matches the outcomes were so obvious. One more thing, what the hell happened to Gail v. Maryse? We had a backstage thing and then they were never mentioned again? Way to treat this tournament like an afterthought. After such a good PPV, tonight was a major letdown. I think they need to get rid of the PPV between the Rumble and Wrestlemania; it kills the momentum of Wrestlemania.