March 9, 2009
Scott Criscuolo

Friday Night Smackdown!
March 6, 2009
Uncasville, Connecticut
Jim Ross and Tazz

We recap Raw, where John Cena won the match, but not the World Heavyweight Title from Edge, and Vickie Guerrero naming Big Show #1 contender.

OPENING ANIMATION

JR welcomes us to Mohegan Sun, where tonight Edge and the Big Show will officially sign the contract for their World Heavyweight Title match at Wrestlemania, and the WWE Champion Triple H tonight will face Umaga. But first…..DONG…….DONG……out comes the Deadman. The Undertaker, who will go one on one with Shawn Michaels at Wrestlemania comes to the ring. Taker stares at the Wrestlemania logo and takes the mike. Taker says for most of his existence, others have chosen to stay clear of his path, for the fear of facing the Undertaker was a road no one wanted to embark on. Taker says he was in pursuit of the hunt, the one staking the claim. Taker says times have changed. Taker says this angers him, and he says the streak is something he never speaks of. Taker says it just so happens that Wrestlemania is the night he shows his peers and the rest of the world what the Undertaker represents. Yet, he says there seems to be a need, a desire to feed egos and lust. He says endless souls line up to make a name for themselves at his expense, and that angers him. The Deadman officially accepts accepts Shawn Michaels’ challenge for Wrestlemania. We then get a vignette of Shawn Michaels talking about Wrestlemania. When we return Taker says that piece was very clever. Deadman says Shawn Michaels has picked the wrong man to play mind games with. Taker says it will only make things worse for him. Taker says Shawn is a icon of this industry. Taker says for 16 Wrestlemanias they have come, and they have gone. He says Shawn’s fate will be no different. Taker says Shawn has tried to make peace with himself, but Taker says Shawn must pray more now than ever before. Taker says on April 5, he will show Shawn Michaels what he told him once before: Sometimes it is Hell, trying to get to Heaven. Awesome promo, in fact maybe a little heelish perhaps. Nonetheless, the hammer has been dropped, and two of the greatest ever will collide April 5 in Houston.

-We return from break with THE Wrestlemania moment, going back to the greatest single day in wrestling history: March 29, 1987, and Wrestlemania III. The show that made all of us wrestling fans.

-Backstage and Vickie’s on the phone with somebody, apparently saying that she hasn’t heard from Edge. Then Jeff Hardy comes in, and Vickie says she has no problem giving Jeff Hardy a qualifying match for Money in the Bank tonight, but she asks him if he would rather face his brother Matt, and Jeff says no. Even though Vickie tries to bait him into changing his mind, reminding Jeff about what happened at the Royal Rumble, Jeff stands steadfast in his decision. He will win tonight, win MITB, then maybe, just maybe, come out after the Edge/Big Show match at Wrestlemania and win the World Heavyweight Championship.

Money in the Bank qualifying match: Matt Hardy vs. MVP
Matt has the mike, and says that Jeff Hardy doesn’t want to fight him. Matt says once again its Jeff running from his problem, but he can’t run from him. He says Jeff wants Money in the Bank? So does he. So tonight, Matt says he will win his match, and hopefully Jeff wins his too. Then they can meet in the ring at Wrestlemania, and Matt says he will destroy Jeff Hardy, as well as the other 6 competitors to take MITB. Matt says he will take that briefcase and become a World Champion. Who would have thought these two would meet in the ring and it would be MVP getting the cheers and Matt Hardy getting the boos? They lock up and MVP with a quick roll-up for 1. MVP with a takedown and waistlock. Matt gets to the ropes and MVP lets go. They lock up again and another waistlock by MVP, but Matt elbows out of it and works MVP over in the corner. MVP whipped into the opposite corner and clotheslined. Into the ropes and MVP and a Russian Leg Sweep. MVP goes for the Playmaker but Matt reverses, misses a clothesline and they jaw with each other as we go to break. We return and Matt has MVP in a headlock on the canvas. During the break Matt hot-shotted MVP on the top rope to gain the advantage. MVP gets to his feet but Matt with a clothesline and back to the headlock. Matt adjusts to a front facelock but MVP pushes Matt into the corner and charges but Matt with an elbow. Matt with a right hand and he “Boss-Man’s” MVP on the second rope for 2. Matt goes back to the headlock. MVP tries to punch out of it and gets a throwaway toss off for 2. MVP whips Matt into the ropes and hits a boot to the gut, and two forearms for 2. Matt with a right hand and MVP reciprocates, then MVP with a jawjacker. MVP hits his Ballin’ elbow for 2. MVP with a roll up for 2. Matt hits the Side Effect, and then looks towards the Twist of Fate, but instead MVP hits a roll-up out of nowhere and gets the surprise 3 count. MVP joins Kane, CM Punk, and Mark Henry in the MITB match, and Matt Hardy is stunned. Brings intrigue to his brother’s match later on. WINNER: MVP (Grade: 2.5)

-Back from break, and as of March 6, we’re 30 days away from Wrestlemania XXV.

-We go to “The Dirt Sheet”, with the World Tag Team Champions Miz & Morrison wearing butts on their face and making fun of the Colon Brothers. Last week, these two teams met for Carlito and Primo’s WWE Tag Team Titles, next week a re-match but this time Miz & Morrison’s World Tag Team Titles will be up for grabs.

Divas Champion Maryse vs. Eve Torres
They jaw with each other as Michelle McCool joins JR and Tazz. Eve with a leapfrog and boot to Maryse’s face. Maryse bails but Eve pitches her back in. As Eve gets back in Maryse clotheslines her with the second rope. Maryse slams Eve’s head into the turnbuckle. Nice line by Michelle when she says Maryse has about 4 moves and one of them is flipping her hair back. Sad but true. Maryse with boots to the head. Maryse goes to her patented sit-down chinlock. Eve flips out of it, and hits a two drop kicks for 2. Eve with a low knee and elbow. Eve to the second rope but misses a cross body. Maryse hits a DDT and gets the win. Just as the match ends Women’s Champion Melina comes into the ring and attacks Maryse as payback for Monday night. Then Michelle McCool comes into the ring and takes Melina out. Michelle stands over both champions that are on the ground as we go to break. WINNER: Maryse (Grade: 1)

-We return from break and Vickie Guerrero is in the ring with the customary contract signing desk, chairs and red carpet. Vickie introduces the segment, but ironically is cut off by her husband, the World Heavyweight Champion. Edge comes down clearly not happy with these turn of events. Edge slowly grabs the mike, and says he’s not going to do this. He’s not going to sign anything. Edge wants to know the truth about Vickie and the Big Show. Vickie says that she hasn’t seen Edge all week, hasn’t called. She loves Edge, and the relationship between she and Big Show is strictly professional. Edge says he got all of her phone messages, but he’s still perplexed. When Edge was out from August to November, Big Show “took care of her”. Then after his match with John Cena Monday night on Raw they drop this bombshell on him. Edge says he found out about this at the same time as the fans, and he says he’s better than that. Edge says it was a slap in the face, and its because Vickie wanted to make him look like an idiot. Vickie says that’s not it, and that everything that happened Monday night was instinct. Vickie says she would never make her baby look bad. Vickie says Edge is special to her. Edge is still frustrated, and he wants to know why the Big Show, why is he so damn special? With that the aforementioned Big Show comes down, dressed in a jacket. He takes a mike and says to Vickie that Edge learned the truth. Vickie tries to stop him, but Show tells Edge the truth is he’s not a good champion. Show says he takes short cuts, wins matches by the skin of his teeth and his the ultimate opportunist. Show says he himself is dominant, and is worthy of the World Heavyweight Champion title. Show says Vickie knows he would be a better champion than Edge would be. Show says at Wrestlemania, as Show signs the contract, that he is going to beat Edge. Edge asks Vickie is this is what this is all about. Edge says if this is it, he apologizes for his other accusations. He does say to Show that this whole largest athlete schtick won’t work with him. He’s an 8-time champion, and has been stepping over competitiors in the 11 years he’s been here. He says he’s quicker than Show, smarter than Show and more talented that Show. Edge says he’s simply better than Show. Edge says he now knows why Vickie chose Big Show, because he is a guarantee to win. Edge says the truth is he is more of a man than Show will ever be. Show says why doesn’t Edge simply sign the contract and prove it. Just as Edge is about to sign it….THE CHAMP IS…HEEEEEEERE!!! The crowd goes insane and John Cena comes in and goes crazy, beats the hell out of Edge and Show, including throwing the table at Edge’s head. Both men are out, and Cena glares at Vickie. No smirks, no smiles, and Cena is all business. He walks up to Vickie, whispers something into her ear, and leaves. I thought he was going to do what Shawn Michaels did in 2004 and sign the contract. Since Show signed first that would have made no sense. Great segment as Vickie starts crying but Cena showed some edge and purpose tonight.

-We get a shot inside the Mohegan Sun Casino, which looks a little emptier than usual. We get a recap of who’s in this year’s WWE Hall of Fame induction class: Steve Austin, the Funk Brothers, and Ricky Steamboat. Now our next inductee: The father of Mid-South Championship Wrestling, “Cowboy” Bill Watts.

-Backstage and Edge is flipping out about John Cena and that he’ll sign the contract right now. Vickie, shaken up and crying, says the signing will be Monday night on Raw. Now she tells to Edge to leave as she needs her space. Nice continuity as Edge says Vickie is still interim GM of Raw with Stephanie McMahon out of the picture.

Money in the Bank qualifying match: Jeff Hardy vs. US Champion Shelton Benjamin
They lock up and Shelton with a half T-Bone for 1. Shelton with right hands and a Northern Lights Suplex for 2. Shelton continues with a regular suplex for 2. Into the ropes and Jeff with a boot, then he ducks a drop kick but misses a cross body and slides under the ropes and hits the floor. Shelton goes outside and hits Jeff with forearms. Shelton goes to whip Jeff into the barricade but Jeff reverses. With Shelton down Jeff runs, jumps the stairs and hits Shelton with a flying leg sweep. Both men are down as we go to break. Back from break and Shelton is driving knees into Jeff’s back. Shelton with a headlock as during the commercial he gained control by reversing Jeff’s double mule kick in the corner into a power bomb on the turnbuckle. Sweet move. Jeff misses a right hand and Shelton with a knee to the back of the neck for 2. Shelton with a powerbomb and then holds the move by bowing Jeff on his knee. Shelton has been on his game in recent weeks. Shelton lays into Jeff with knees to the back as Jeff has had practically no offense. Shelton charges but Jeff backdrops him near the ropes and Shelton lands on the apron. Jeff suplexes Shelton over the ropes but the Gold Standard lands on his feet and goes for a neckbreaker but Jeff holds onto the ropes. Jeff takes Shelton down and hits his double legs to the breadbasket, then a low drop kick for 2. Jeff with a front neckbreaker for 2 as to no one’s shock Matt Hardy comes down to ringside. Jeff Hardy hits the Whisper in the Wind and a Twist of Fate. Then Matt gets in the ring and both men go eye to eye. Then, as expected, Matt punches Shelton in the face and gets Jeff Hardy disqualified. Matt then turns around and waits for Jeff to attack him, but Jeff just stands there. Matt leaves the ring and Jeff is left standing there. WINNER: Shelton Benjamin by disqualification (Grade: 2.5)

-We go back to Monday night and recap the confrontation between Triple H and Randy Orton, leading to their WWE Title match announcement for Wrestlemania. We go to break and return with a trailer for “12 Rounds”.

WWE Champion Triple H vs. Umaga
Triple H starts punching away and the ref separates them. When he comesback in Umaga starts head butting. Umaga slams the Game’s head into the turnbuckle. He whips Triple H into the opposite corner but Trips comes out with a clothesline. HHH with another right hand, then some more. Umaga whips Triple H into the corner but walks into a boot. Triple H comes out of the corner and eats a thrust kick to the throat. Triple H is taken down with a head butt and leg drop for 2. Umaga with a right hand, then he whips HHH into the ropes, but eats the low knee. Triple H with right hands, ducks a clothesline but gets hit with a thrust shot to the throat. Umaga charges but Triple H pulls the rope down and the Samoan Bulldozer goes flying. Umaga lands wrong and is clutching his knee. As Triple H is looking on Legacy comes out of nowhere and hits the ring, attacking Triple H. He fights back but the numbers game takes him out. Eventually Triple H and Randy Orton go flying over the announce table. Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes come over and help Orton beat the WWE Champ down. The beatdown continues as it seems Umaga was legitimately hurt since we haven’t seen him since Legacy hit the ring. Rhodes and DiBiase holds the limp Triple H up as Orton jaws with him and beats him in the head. Eventually Orton and Triple H are in the ring together and the crowd loudly chants RANDY SUCKS. Orton stands alone as Triple H is down and out. I’m sure this segment, which was about 7 minutes, wasn’t meant to go this long but Umaga’s injury forced it to. The show ends with Orton stalking over the prone Triple H. WINNER: No Contest (Grade: N/A)

FINAL GRADE: B

MVP: MVP & Shelton Benjamin
Runner Up: John Cena
Non MVP: Umaga
Runner Up: The Hardys

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