April 18, 2009
Friday Night Smackdown!
April 10, 2009
Jim Ross and Todd Grisham
-We start with a video recap of Sunday’s 25th Wrestlemania.
The fireworks go off and our post-Wrestlemania Smackdown is underway! Jim Ross and the Grish welcomes us. Tonight John Cena will be on the Cutting Edge! We start with a smug and gloating Matt Hardy as he comes down the ramp. Matt of course shocked everyone and defeated his brother Jeff at Wrestlemania. He takes a mike, and talks about the great moments at Wrestlemania, including his win over his brother with the Twist of Fate! He says Jeff is nothing more than a charismatic disappointment. He proved at Wrestlemania that he is the better Hardy brother, and he should come out here and apologize to him and the fans for being a disappointment, and if he doesn’t Matt says he will put Jeff on a stretcher and will never wrestle. So Matt tells Jeff to come out and tell all his fans he’s an extreme disappointment. Matt keeps baiting him on, and Jeff finally comes out. He stands at the top of the ramp, then charges the ring and Matt runs off. Then the new (or old) General Manager Teddy Long came out, and called Matt out for saying that if Matt doesn’t get an apology he would put Jeff on a stretcher. Teddy says one of these two men could be drafted Monday night. So tonight they both could go out on stretchers. So tonight, Matt will face Jeff in a stretcher match. I’m glad Teddy’s back, I needed a change of pace from the Vickie nonsense.
-We return from break and Eve is with Kofi Kingston, and he talks about his role in Sunday’s Money in the Bank match, about his ring in his backyard as a child. He wanted to shock the world like Shawn Michaels and Razor Ramon did at Wrestlemania X, and tonight he’ll try and shock the world again.
Big Show vs. Kofi Kingston
Maybe a preview of one of SD’s draft picks. Kofi waves his legs at Show, but Show catches them and throws them to the ground. Kofi bails, but Show grabs him by his dreads, and throws him back into the ring. Kofi with quick kicks but they do nothing. Show with some clubbing forearms and frying pan chops. Show with a punch to Kofi’s ribs. Another blow to Kofi’s back. Show locks up a Cobra Clutch and throws Kofi across the ring, but Kofi lands on his feet and hits a pair of drop kicks to stagger Show. Kofi charges but Show catches him and looks to power bomb him, but Kofi flips out of it, then goes for another drop kick but Show swats him away. Show throws Kofi across the ring again, then whips him into the corner. Kofi flips over the ropes and kicks Show in the head. Finally a kick to the head takes Show down. Kofi goes to the top rope, but when he jumps Show uncorks a right hand and knocks him cold. It’s academic from there. WINNER: Big Show (Grade: 1.5)
-We have a video recap of the Hall of Fame ceremony, which was pretty cool. Looking forward to the extra disk on the DVD.
Santino Marella vs. The Great Khali
Santino comes out to talk about his twin sister “Santina” winning the Miss Wrestlemania battle royal. He was invited to Smackdown by Teddy Long to issue an open “invachallenge”. So out comes Great Khali with babyface red tights. Runjin Singh grabs the mike and says he doesn’t have to fight Khali, on one condition. Khali thinks Santino’s sister is hot, and if she is on Khali’s “KISS-CAM”, Khali will not fight Santino. Santino says his sister isn’t a “Woman of the Night” like these University of Texas co-eds. Santino starts throwing jabs at Khali about his breath and cigarettes, Khali starts talking in half-English. Runjin Singh says to Santino it’s the wrong answer. So the bell rings, Khali powerbombs him and that’s it. WINNER: Great Khali (Grade: 0)
-We return to the Longhorns campus, and we now have a video package chronicling “17-0”, including his win over Shawn Michaels in a 5-star classic at Wrestlemania XXV.
Gail Kim vs. Michelle McCool
FINALLY!!! A women’s match with two decent women’s wrestlers on Smackdown. I guess it’s been since Michelle/Natalya hooked up last year. Michelle takes Gail down with a waist lock, then some forearms. Michelle with kicks, but she backs off and Gail rolls over Michelle’s back and hits a drop kick. Gail with a hurricanrana, then some form of foot stomp maneuver. Michelle bails for a powder, then Gail attempts to suplex her back in but Michelle suplexes her over the rope and they fight on the apron. Michelle shoves Gail off the apron through the post. Michelle smacks Gail in the face with a boot, then pitches her back in the ring and gets a 2 count. Michelle misses a drop kick, and Gail with some right hands and clotheslines, then a cross body off the second turnbuckle for 2. Gail goes for a cross body off the top rope but misses. Michelle goes for the 3 count, but on 2 Gail turns it over and gets the 3 count herself. Pretty decent match and with some more time could have been better. WINNER: Gail Kim (Grade: 2.5)
-We return from break with Edge in the ring as its Cutting Edge time! He’s of course not in the best of moods and says he hasn’t slept all week. He says he rolled into Houston preparing for the biggest win of his life at the 25th anniversary of Wrestlemania. However his moment and the title were stolen from him. Stolen by his guest tonight, and here he is…the new World Heavyweight Champion. With that out comes the heat magnet, John Cena to a raucous ovation. He actually comes out wearing the title, which he doesn’t do often. Edge tells Cena to take a seat, but Cena waits to get out his THE CHAMP IS HERE!!! Edge says he stole that belt from him, and Cena says he can’t handle losing. Edge says that title is everything, its his lifeline. Edge says he can handle the blood, sweat and tears of his life, as long as he’s champ. Edge says to Cena he stole it from him. Cena says really? Cena says that’s all the problem is. Cena tells Edge to get over himself. Cena says Edge lost at Wrestlemania, pure and simple. Edge tells Cena he ruined his life. Cena says what? Cena says how did Edge think this was going to end up? Cena asks Edge they’ve gone through everything, from TLCs to Long Island Sound to hometown wars. Cena says through all the years and all the matches, whoever they’re cheering for, the fans know that one will raise the bar to the other. Cena says tonight Edge had a chance to talk about maybe the greatest rivalry in WWE history. Instead Cena says Edge whined and bitched about stealing titles and ruining lives. Cena says if that’s it, it’s done and Cena’s time is wasted. Edge tells Cena he hates him. Edge says hate is a strong word but it fits, but its true. Edge says this rivalry has exhausted them and worn them out. At Backlash its finally going to end. Someone’s not going to get up, and the one left standing will be him. Cena says no, and says Edge may be a better wrestler than him, and may be a little smarter, but Edge is desperate. Cena says the stipulation says it all. It’s pure punishment and violence. Cena says he’s tougher than Edge, and that’s why Edge hates him. It’s not the hat, the wristbands, the t-shirts, the dog tags it’s the truth. Cena says every time Edge has tried to knock him down he gets right back up, and that’s why Edge hates him. Cena says if Edge hates him right now, hit him now. If Edge hits him right now, hell will be unleashes. Both men take their shirts off, Edge uncorks his fist, but hesitates. He turns around, and leaves the ring. He turns to look back at Edge, then walks down the ramp and away. Cena just shakes his head. An unbelievable promo that immediately shakes off that crappy Wrestlemania storyline and now its back to basics, like their 2006 feud.
WWE Undisputed Tag Team Champions The Colon Brothers vs. Team Priceless
That’s not their actual name, but I like Team Priceless. They start by double-teaming Carlito, DiBiase is the legal man. Carlito starts punching out of the corner, but in a sweet move Carlito goes for a hip toss, but DiBiase blocks it, drops Carlito to his ass and punts him in the face. Tag to Cody Rhodes, who stomps the ribs. Carlito sneaks a small package for 2. Cody with a body slam but misses an elbow. Carlito tags Primo, and after a Carlito slam, he powerbombs little brother on Rhodes for 2. Cody’s worked over in the corner and a tag back to Carlito, but Cody with a jawjacker. Tag to DiBiase, but a double clothesline misses and Carlito with his springboard double elbow. The champs clothesline Priceless out of the ring. No mid-match commercials so far. That was a good spot for it. Carlito turns his head, and DiBiase tries a sneak attack but gets clotheslined. DiBiase gets up, and then they go to break. That was weird, I think that break was not edited right. We return and DiBiase has Primo in a body scissors. DiBiase with a clothesline and a tag to Rhodes. Cody stomps the mid-section, and more punches. Tag to DiBiase and a double stomp to Primo’s gut for 2. Carlito tries to get in the ring but is stopped by the ref. Hard whip into the corner by DiBiase, then a tag to Cody who cinches the Abdominal Stretch. Primo with a hip toss breaks the hold. Cody charges and Primo backdrops him to the floor. Primo gets the tag to Carlito and he gets the hot tag offense. Carlito drop kicks DiBiase off the apron, but Cody with a forearm shot. Carlito with a boot to the face, but as he goes to the top rope DiBiase pulls Carlito off the top rope, which gives Cody a chance to hit CrossRhodes for the 3 count. WINNERS: Team Priceless (Grade: 2.5)
-The four teams start brawling, as Primo gets hit with DiBiase’s “Dream Street” finisher, and then they work over Carlito as their captain, Randy Orton comes to the ring. He looks over his guys’ handiwork, then raises their hands in victory. I see some gold in Legacy’s future. We go to break with a promo for Superstars, which starts Thursday night on WGN America. Maybe we’ll see some reviews for that in the future, who knows?
-We return and Legacy is still in the ring. Randy Orton has the mike and says at Backlash there will be a six-man tag team match to determine the WWE Champion. In one corner will be Legacy, and in the other corner Triple H, Shane McMahon, and Batista. The crowd pops for all of them. He mentions Batista’s return on Monday night, and Orton reminds everyone who put Batista on the shelf. Legacy is a well-oiled machine, whereas the other team is hotheads and egomaniacs. Orton says once Backlash is over, he will take his rightful place as the WWE Universe’s WWE Champion. I feel a title change at Backlash, just maybe. Pretty good show so far, mostly from the promos.
-Todd takes the mike and explains the Stretcher match rules to the fans, but you all know the rules so I won’t go over it.
Stretcher match: Jeff Hardy vs. Matt Hardy
No face paint for Jeff tonight. I like that touch, bare bones. Jeff starts with boots and punches. Jeff with clotheslines in the corner, but Matt avoids the double mule kick. Both are outside and Jeff with punches and head shots to the apron. Both continue outside as Jeff tries to suplex Matt on the stretcher but misses. Matt with a low blow and he starts clubbing away. Both are back in the ring and Matt with a clothesline. Jeff blocks a suplex attempt, and hits a gourdbuster. Matt blocks a Twist of Fate and hits a Side Effect. Matt brings a stretcher over to the apron and tries to get Jeff on it. He does and starts wheeling it up the ramp, he gets two wheels over the line but Jeff gets off it and hits a clothesline. Jeff is on top of the ramp, he stands on the stretcher and slides down the mat, then planchas off it onto Matt. Both men are on the ground and we go to break. We return and both men are in the ring down. Matt gets up and whips his brother in the ropes but Jeff with a clothesline. Matt blocks a punch and hooks some sort of submission where he hooks Jeff’s arms like a Pedigree attempt, then wraps his legs around him. Jeff walks around with his brother hooked to him but Jeff falls to the ground. Interesting submission, I hope he keeps using it. Matt lets go and Jeff is limp. Matt grabs the second stretcher on the ramp, and gets Jeff on it. This commentary isn’t as bad as I thought, but it won’t last. Jeff starts punching back as the stretcher gets halfway up the ramp. Jeff stands up as Matt grabs a leg and hits an Enziguiri. Jeff whips Matt into the stairs. Jeff grabs a stretcher and throws Matt on it. Jeff goes up the ramp but Matt gets off it and slams the stretcher into Jeff’s ribs. They keep punching away and Jeff rolls down the ramp. Matt tries to slam Jeff in the head with the stretcher but Matt ducks. Jeff’s pitched back into the ring, and Matt grabs a chair. Jeff punches the chair into Matt’s face and the chair lands on the stretcher. Matt is punched and falls on the stretcher and the chair. Matt’s on the stretcher, and Jeff goes to the top rope for a plancha, but he over shoots Matt and lands butt first on the stretcher and the steel chair. Both men are down, then Jeff gets up and starts punching away. He gets Matt on a stretcher and runs it into the steel steps. More work on the steps, then with Matt on the stretcher, Jeff goes up top and goes for a Swanton but Matt misses and Jeff lands right on the stretcher. Nice move. Matt starts running the stretcher up the ramp, but Jeff keeps sitting up. So Matt grabs a chair and pastes Jeff square in the face with it. Jeff’s out and Matt successfully runs the stretcher over the yellow line. Matt kicks the stretcher down the ramp and celebrates at the top of it. WINNER: Matt Hardy (Grade: 3)
FINAL GRADE: B+
MVP: Matt Hardy
Runner Up: Edge/John Cena
Non MVP: The Colon Brothers
Runner Up: Jeff Hardy