February 24, 2006
Matt Peddycord

Survivor Series 1991
November 28, 1991
Detroit, MI
Joe Louis Arena

It’s the 5th Annual Survivor Series!

Your hosts are Gorilla Monsoon and Bobby Heenan.

We kick things off IMMEDIATELY with Monsoon talking about Randy Savage being attacked by Jake Roberts and his COBRA on the Sunday before the event! Poor Randy! Also, WWF “Prez” Jack Tunney, if that is his REAL name…makes an announcement straight off the teleprompter that says he takes full responsibility for Roberts’ actions. Therefore, all king cobras and reptiles are barred from ringside. This should’ve always been a rule, but I guess WWF thought it was a given. This of course as we ALL know, leads to Savage vs. Roberts at Tuesday in Texas. Can we get on with the show now, please? Thank you.

Ted DiBiase, The Mountie, Warlord and Ric Flair vs. Bret Hart, Virgil, Davey Boy Smith and Roddy Piper - 4-on-4 Survivor Series Elimination Match

We’ve got four feuds, three (but not really!) champions, and two losers in one match. DiBiase/Virgil, Mountie/Hart, Warlord/Bulldog, and Flair/Piper. Three champions in Bret Hart, the IC Champ; DiBiase, the Million Dollar Champ; and Ric Flair, the REAL World’s Champ (but not really!) The two losers of course are Warlord and Virgil. And yes, this is one match. Just saying. Anyways, I’m excited for this one. DiBiase and Piper start it off, even though Piper wants Flair. DiBiase suckers Piper around so that Flair can come in and kick Piper in the butt! HAHA! Piper gets pounded but comes back with a clothesline and an atomic drop on the TOP ROPE! Man, what a HOT crowd! Heenan cries for a DQ, but Joey Marella doesn’t care. Sherri gets literally dragged into the ring, but her and Ted’s plan backfires and she ends up swapping spit involuntarily with Piper. She rolls out of the ring in DISGUST! I don’t blame you, sister. She gets sent back to the dressing room. The faces keep DiBiase in their corner and trade tags while working on his arm. I mean, they TEAR it up! Bret gets in there and makes the first mistake. DiBiase loudly makes a spot call, “Reverse, charge” out of the corner where Bret goes knee first into the turnbuckle. Bret kicks out of a spinning toe hold and gets a few near-falls out of a little rollup sequence. Bret then goes back to the arm. DiBiase fights up and tags in Flair. WOO! On his first move on WWF PPV, he misses an elbow drop. Bret nails an inverted atomic drop and tags in Bulldog. Bulldog delivers a catapult into the corner and the Flair flop is inevitable. Davey gets a press slam and then tags in Piper. RUH ROH! Piper wails and chops away on Flair until he exits the ring and flops down on the floor. Piper follows suit and Flair meets the steel steps headfirst. Back in, Flair rolls right into his corner, where he tags in Warlord. If you don’t know who he is, think of a bald Gene Snitsky. Piper acts like he wants a test of strength, but of course he doesn’t and tags in Bulldog. Warlord expects a bunch of shoulderblocks, so Bulldog pulls out a dropkick instead. Bulldog’s momentum gets stopped short by a boot out of the corner. Mountie, or Jacques Rougeau, gets tagged in. We go to the back and see Jimmy Hart watching on the monitor, so we totally miss how Bulldog gets across the ring to tag in Bret. Mountie freaks out and runs out of the ring, and then scoots in and tags in DiBiase. What a Canadian pussy. DiBiase and Bret lock up with Bret having full advantage over Ted. A backbreaker from Bret sets up an elbow drop for a near-fall. Double-KO! Who’s gonna tag first?! DiBiase does! He tags in Mountie, and Bret tags in Bulldog. Bulldog destroys him from one side of the ring to the other. Flair comes in and works over Bulldog in the corner to no effect. He begs off and then kicks Bulldog in the gut in normal Flair fashion. He calls in DiBiase, but they both get clotheslined. No tag was ever made for Flair to come in. Bulldog nails Warlord and gets the RUNNING POWERSLAM on Mountie! Bulldog covers, but everybody gets in so the ref can’t make the count. Meanwhile, Flair comes off the top and nails Bulldog in the back of the head. He covers Bulldog for the three-count at 10:56. Piper comes in to replace Bulldog, but gets suckered right into the heel corner. Flair tags in DiBiase, but Piper fights back anyway on the WHOLE team! That could only last for so long as Mountie yanks Piper out to the floor and pounds on him. Back in, Flair chops on Piper, followed by the rolling knee drop. Flair tries a second knee drop, but misses. Piper uses that as an opening for the figure-four, and he locks it on! Shortly after, DiBiase breaks it up. It’s kind of useless to do a submission finishing move in a match like this, unless it gets down to 1-on-1. Flair tags in DiBiase. Ted gives Piper a shin breaker and then applies the spinning toe hold once again. Piper counters with a roll up for a two count. DiBiase tags in Mountie and pulls Piper back to their corner. Mountie locks in a Boston crab. Piper escapes by being so close to the face corner, he just tags in Virgil. Mountie gets clotheslined and wants to tag out, but nobody wants in! Well, now they do. Flair tags in and just as it looks like Virgil has made a mistake; he comes back with punches and a backdrop. Flair begs off and tags in DiBiase. He sends Ted’s head to the buckle about ten times, but then falls victim to a powerslam. DiBiase tags in Warlord and he comes in and dumps Virgil for Flair to chop on him and send him head-first to the steel steps. Bret comes over and helps Virgil back into the ring. Warlord locks in the FULL-NELSON, but Bret comes off the top with a forearm to the back to break the hold. Piper covers Warlord and pins him at 17:00. Piper wasn’t legal there either! As Gorilla says, “Turnabouts fair play!” That was some pretty good booking continuity there. Piper then surprises DiBiase with a rollup for a two count. Piper blocks a suplex and hits one of his own. Tag to Virgil, and he tries to put DiBiase away with his own hold, the MILLION DOLLAR DREAM! But DiBiase isn’t having that, so he drives Virgil head-first into the top turnbuckle. Tag to Flair and he works Virgil over in the corner. He follows that up with a back suplex and then tags in Mountie. Mountie hits a nice dropkick and then tags DiBiase back in. He hits a gutwrench suplex and then tags in Flair. He covers Virgil with his feet on the ropes for a two count. In comes DiBiase and he levels Virgil with a clothesline. However, Virgil comes back with a spinning neckbreaker and tags in Piper. Flair gets tagged in as well and his offense has no effect on Piper whatsoever. Piper backs Flair into the corner and tries a ten-count punch, but Flair comes out with an inverted atomic drop. Flair doesn’t get it how he intended and gets poked in the eyes. Now it’s a pier-six brawl and everybody is in there wailing on each other. Flair flips out of the corner and out onto the floor, and that’s when the ref disqualifies everybody who was in the ring. That leaves Flair as the soul survivor who was OUTSIDE the ring when the ref made the call! Flair’s team wins! (22:48) Survivor: Ric Flair. If only this had had a great finish, it would be an easy **** ½. But since the finish was pretty lame, let’s give it *** ½.

Mean Gene interviews Randy Savage. We see stills from the snake biting his arm. Mean Gene ~ “That had to be horrifying!” Savage ~ “Well it was.” The venom from the cobra hurt him really bad and yada yada yada, he can’t wait to beat up Jake Roberts at Tuesday in Texas. Okerlund asks Savage what Elizabeth thinks about all this, so she comes out and tells everybody thanks for the support. She says she’ll be in TEXAS! OH SNAP! Next match, please.

Col. Mustafa, The Bezerker, Skinner and Hercules vs. Texas Tornado, Tito Santana, Hacksaw Jim Duggan and Sgt. Slaughter - 4-on-4 Survivor Series Elimination Match

I never did hear a bell. This makes no sense considering Slaughter was a heel three months ago and is already being built as a great American hero again. It would’ve been better if they just killed him off for a while. Skinner fights off a headlock, but gets DECKED by a FLYING JALAPENO and rolls out to the floor. Slaughter rolls him back in. Tito tries a second FLYING JALAPENO, but Skinner ducks out of the way. Skinner just looks too disgusting to wrestle with. Tag to Bezerker, and he misses something off the second turnbuckle. He looked like he slipped while skiing down a mountain. Tito tags in Von Erich, and Bezerker misses a dropkick. Von Erich gets trapped in the heel corner, and Hercules gets tagged in. Von Erich gets free and tags in Duggan. HOOOOOOOO! Herc tries a shoulderblock, but Duggan stands firm. Duggan comes back with wild punches, and then goes after everyone on the heel side. Herc comes up behind him and then they all go to work on him. In comes Bezerker, and he lays in some more lame offense. Mustafa tags in and goes a headlock. Since this match SUCKS, I would rather listen to some good ol’ commentary. While Heenan is annoying the crap out of Gorilla, Gorilla says, “Can you (I’m guessing some stage guy. Surely he doesn’t mean us out here in PPV land.) get some security guards, please?” Heenan ~”What, are you gonna have another hotdog?” HAHAHA, what a great zinger. Duggan fights up, but goes right back down to a double throat-thrust for a near-fall. Duggan comes back, but Mustafa loads up his boot, and kicks Duggan in the gut for a two count. Duggan pulls off a REALLY bad suplex and makes the tag to Slaughter. Slaughter gives Mustafa the universal “UP YOURS” sign and then hits a clothesline to pin him at 7:57. It would be nice for this situation if that would’ve ended things, but it keeps going. Here comes Bezerker with some more offensively dull offense. Slaughter comes back and tags in Duggan. Bezerker gets clotheslined out of the ring, and then backdropped out to the floor! He comes back in, and Duggan makes the quick tag to Von Erich. He gets backed into the heel corner, and Herc tags in. Surprise tag to Tito and we’ve got a FLYING JALAPENO for the second pin at 12:05. It’s now 4-on-2. Skinner comes in and chokes on Tito. Tito makes a blind tag to Slaughter and he comes in and sneaks up behind Skinner for a rollup and another pin at 13:31. OMG, IT’S BEZERKER VS. THE WORLD! Gorilla ~ “I’d love to take your money!” Tag to Duggan and he hits the FIVE-POINT STANCE for the win. (14:19) Survivors: Team Duggan. Oh MAN, that was horrible. CRAP

Mean Gene interviews Jake Roberts for his response. He reiterates that what happened with the snake was an accident and that the snake had been de-venomized by the lab people. Okerlund says he should be fired, and that Jake should be grateful for Tunney and the fans who voted him to be reinstated him. Roberts says to not point the finger at him, but those who wanted him back. His response to the “NO MORE REPTILES AT RINGSIDE” rule was simply, he was the snake you should’ve been worried about all along. Oh yeah, and Tuesday in Texas is the end of the beginning. WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?!

WWF Champion Hulk Hogan vs. Undertaker (w/Paul Bearer)

Monsoon mentions Taker is undefeated at this point, but I somehow don’t believe that’s true whatsoever. They lock up after thirty seconds of stalling and Taker shoves Hogan into the corner, but Hogan avoids a charge. More circling until Hogan slaps on a headlock. Taker gets out and takes Hogan down with a shoulderblock and he bails to cheers from the crowd. Hogan stalls on the outside for awhile before re-entering the ring. “HOGAN!” chants from the women and children. Taker GOOZLES him into the corner, followed by some creepy heavy breathing and eye rolling. Taker continues with the choking and face pulling all around the ring for a bit. Taker hits a slam, but misses an elbow. Hogan comes back and tries a slam, but he couldn’t slam Taker. Heenan ~ “HULKAMANIA IS DEAD, MONSOON!” Since Hogan couldn’t slam him, he resorts to eye-gouging and kicks below the belt. Taker won’t sell any of Hogan’s stuff. Taker gets clotheslined out to the floor, but he lands on his feet like always. He yanks Hogan out to the floor, where Hogan meets the steel steps and then gets choked out with a cable. Back in, we get more choking and then a face claw that lasted 2 ½ minutes! Just as it looks Hogan is going to make his come back, Taker nails him with a flying clothesline to more cheers than boos. Hogan no-sells the TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER, and then hulks up. Hogan punches him until Taker finally falls to one knee. Hogan gets the silly body slam he couldn’t get before and here comes the NATCHA BOY, RIC FLAIR! Hogan tries the leg drop, but Bearer grabs his ankle as he comes off the ropes. Hogan sees Flair at ringside, and comes down and pops him. Hogan comes back in the ring and hits the big boot, but once again Bearer is there to grab a hold of his ankle to prevent the leg drop. While Hebner is busy trying to keep Bearer out of the ring, Flair gently sets a STEEL CHAIR into the ring where Taker delivers a TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER. Flair pulls the chair out of the ring, and Taker pins Hulk to win his first championship to a HUGE face pop. (12:45) Any match that consists of 2 ½ minutes of a rest hold gets a CRAP rating from me. Taker really didn’t become that good of a worker until around 1996. It was his character that made the man a millionaire anyway.

We now go to Mean Gene freaking out in the back about Hogan’s condition after what just went down. Roddy Piper comes over for a word and calls Taker an “Addams Family reject.” By the way, since when did Piper ever care so much about Hogan’s well-being?

Now we have Sean Mooney in the “locker room” with Flair and Hennig. The WWF Hogan/Flair feud could’ve been SO awesome had blown-off at WrestleMania. I think I liked Flair coming after Hogan in WWF more so than Hogan coming after Flair in WCW. FLAIR’S THE REAL WORLD’S CHAMPION! WOOO!

In comes a half-ton of fat in EARTHQUAKE, TYPHOON, IRS and JIMMY HART for an interview with Gene. Earthquake just talks about after-shocks on LOD, Hart talks about Tunney’s injustice to their team by suspending Roberts and IRS wants to make sure Bossman pays. Typhoon says if there had 150 opponents and only 3 of us, they’d still outweigh them all or something along those lines.

If we have more interview after this one, I swear. Mooney stands by with LOD and Bossman. Animal says he’s cool with Tunney’s decision. Bossman says the Disasters and IRS are going to serve hard time. Didn’t see that coming, did ya? Hawk talks about turning the Disasters and IRS into nasty sweat socks. Mooney interrupts Hawk’s “OOOOOOOOOOO WHAT A RUSH!”

OH MY GOSH! GENE IS WITH TUNNEY NOW! Gene wants to know what he’s going to do about the WWF title match. Tunney announces a rematch for Tuesday in Texas. Tunney will be at ringside to ensure a boring time for all. NEXT MATCH, PLEASE.

Beverly Brothers and Nasty Boys vs. Bushwhackers and Rockers - 4-on-4 Survivor Series Elimination Match

The Beverly Brothers consisted of Beau and Blake Beverly, formerly known as Wayne Bloom and Mike Enos. They wrestled in the AWA until it folded in 1990 together and won their tag-team titles. Then they went to the NWA and wrestled under masks and managed by Ole Anderson. They were called the Minnesota Wrecking Team and jobbed for the Steiners before leaving for McMahonland where they were WWF’s answer to the Midnight Express. That brings us to where we are right now. The Bushwhackers kick things off taking turns beating on the Nastys AND the Beverlys with their usual ridiculous offense, then the Rockers come in and hit stereo dropkicks on the Nastys. Now we get down to business as Blake pairs up with Michaels. Blake misses a charge, but comes back with an inverted atomic drop and a backbreaker. He tags in Knobbs, and Michaels tags in Luke. Now Knobbs misses a charge, but instead of Luke following up, he poses like an idiot and gets nailed with a middle-rope clothesline to be the first elimination at 5:21. Michaels comes in for Luke and Sags tags in. Sags delivers some bland offense, so Monsoon and Heenan decide to shill Tuesday in Texas instead. Sags misses a charge in the corner, so Michaels hits a top-rope crossbody for two. Jannetty tags in and works the arm. Sags takes Jannetty into his corner and tags in Beau. Jannetty flips out of a backdrop and lands a superkick for two. Jannetty tries a headlock on several occasions, but Beau is out on every one of them. Beau hits a gutwrench suplex for two. They do a double-knockdown situation. Beau tags in Blake and Jannetty tags in Butch. Was that a hot tag? No, it was hardly even lukewarm. The Beverly brothers bump around for Butch, but it’s 2-on-1 and Butch goes down to what appears a double-team face slam to eliminate Butch at 10:41. It’s down to the Rockers vs. Nasty Boys and Beverly Brothers. Jannetty comes in and works on Beau with some pretty good moves for ’91. He gets a real smooth headscissors for a two-count. Jannetty nails an enziquri that sends Beau into his corner to tag in Blake. Michaels tags in and works the arm. Blake fights back and the result is cheating from the heels by choking Michaels in the ropes. The Beverly brothers double-team Michaels with a leapfrog-backbreaker move we saw Benjamin/Haas use in 2003. The Nasty Boys continue with the cheating out on the floor. Back in the ring, Beau delivers some more pretty boring offense. Nothing happens worth noting until Michaels gets a backslide and pins Beau at 13:54. The heels exchanges tags in and out, not really doing anything. Michaels tries to come back a few times, but it goes nowhere until Michaels nails Sags with a clothesline from the apron down onto the floor! Knobbs comes over and eats a superkick! Back in, Michaels comes off the top onto Sags, but gets jabbed in the gut on the way down. Blake tags in and makes a mistake by ducking too soon off a whip and Michaels kicks him in the teeth and makes the hot tag to Jannetty. Jannetty goes crazy on everybody, including a running back elbow on Knobbs for a near-fall. Blake comes back in and takes a few surprise rollups from Jannetty. The Nastys tag in and out and go to work on Jannetty. Sags hits a nice pumphandle slam. He does it better than BG James simply because he doesn’t hump the guy before he lifts him up. Knobbs comes in and comes off the middle rope, but he hits knees and that allows Michaels to get tagged in. The Rockers double-team the heel trio until Sags’ foot catches Michaels in the face as Jannetty was going to slam him. Knobbs seizes the moment and pins Michaels at 19:42. KNOBBS PINS HBK! Michaels’ pitches a fit to Jannetty, so when Jannetty asks for forgiveness, Michaels tells him to “Go get them!” Knobbs nails Jannetty from behind. However, he misses a charge and Jannetty face-plants him for a near-fall. Sags comes in without a tag and tosses Jannetty out to the floor. Back in, Blake hits a powerslam, but arrogantly lifts Jannetty up at two. In comes Knobbs and he grabs an arm wringer, but Jannetty flips out and pulls Knobbs out to the floor. He sends Knobbs into the steel ringpost, and then delivers a superkick to Sags. Jannetty goes up top with both Sags and Knobbs on the floor and hits a plancha on both of them! Back in, Jannetty swinging face-plants Blake. The Nastys are back in, and Sags gets rolled up. Knobbs is right there though and he reverses the small package in Sags’ favor for the pin to win the match. (23:06) They should’ve at least let Jannetty eliminate one of the Nastys before ending this. If it wasn’t for the Rockers stuff, this would’ve gotten a total CRAP from me, but what they did was somewhat decent. Survivors: Blake Beverly, Brian Knobbs and Jerry Sags. *

Natural Disasters and IRS vs. LOD and Big Bossman - 3-on-3 Survivor Series Elimination Match

This was supposed to be Jake Roberts joining IRS and the Disasters vs. LOD, Big Bossman and Sid Justice. But of course, as it turned out, Roberts got “suspended” so to keep it fair, we’re left with this. I’ve seen this show I believe four times in the last six or seven years, and I still don’t really remember anything about this match. LOD are tag champs and the fat disasters want their belts. Bossman hates IRS because, well I don’t really remember why. They stall for a good long minute after the bell until IRS and Bossman finally lock up. IRS avoids some of Bossman’s offense to start, but a hard running bump in the corner. Bossman runs around like some crazy Detroit crackhead hobo. IRS tags out to Earthquake and he wants Animal, so here he comes. They do a shoulderblock stand-off, so Animal tries a running crossbody instead and gets caught into a backbreaker. Earthquake misses a splash, and gets nailed with a dropkick and a shoulderblock for two. IRS tags back in and he gets taken into the face corner. Hawk tags in and he works the arm, but IRS gets in the ropes. Blind tag to Typhoon, and IRS gets pressed by Hawk onto Typhoon, but he catches him. Hawk doesn’t sweat it and nails a dropkick. Typhoon falls back into the face corner and gets pounded on by Bossman and Animal. HEY, THAT’S CHEATING! Typhoon gets out of there and just walks over to Earthquake. Hawk didn’t even try to stop him. Nothing worth noting during that exchange, so IRS tags back in. He gets dropped with a back suplex and a fist drop. Bossman tags in and he nails the Bossman straddle. Earthquake distracts the ref by getting into it with LOD out on the floor. Meanwhile, Typhoon slides in IRS’s briefcase to him and then he nails Bossman with it to eliminate him at 6:24. “LOD” chants start up. The Disasters double-team Animal in the corner. Earthquake delivers a belly-to-belly throw on Animal for a near-fall. The heels continue the breakdown of LOD until Typhoon eats a boot off a charge into the corner. Animal makes the hot tag to Hawk and after some heel miscommunication; Typhoon gets KO’ed with the brief case and gets pinned at 9:39. For you slow ones out there, we’re down to LOD vs. Earthquake & IRS. Earthquake is pissed at IRS for nailing Typhoon, but what can you do. Earthquake quits the match and leaves with Typhoon to go to the back to be counted out at around the 11-minute mark. It looks to be murder time for Irwin. IRS actually avoids a charge and Hawk goes shoulder-first into the steel ringpost. IRS tosses Hawk out to the floor, where he meets the steel steps. They brawl for a little while longer out on the floor before re-entering the ring. IRS stays in control, but goes to a chinlock to get the crowd to cheer for Hawk. Hawk fights up, but they then screw up a double-knockdown. Hawk reverses a suplex into one of his own and then tags in Animal. Animal delivers some of his usual offense until Hawk comes in for a double-clothesline. IRS decides to F this and exit stage right. Bossman shows back up and makes sure IRS serves his hard time! Back in, Hawk hits a top-rope clothesline for the pin. (15:22) Why no Doomsday Device? Nevertheless, this was pretty bad. Survivors: LOD. ½*

Final Thoughts: Thank God for that first match. Otherwise, this would’ve been WORST PPV EVER. They put all their best workers in the first match, so it could only go down from there. For historical reasons, however, it was the first Survivor Series PPV with a WWF Title match, and it resulted in a title change to a new star. Was it a monumental change? No, but were any of Taker’s WWF or WWE title wins? Let’s just say this; if you’re a fan of the workers of the first match, this is for you. Other than that, if you want to see Taker win his first title, get the Tombstone DVD. Don’t bother with this.

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