August 26, 2006
Matt Peddycord

WWE SummerSlam 2006
August 20, 2006
Boston, MA
Banknorth Garden

Is this NOT the second-biggest PPV of the year anymore or what? It appears as though there was very minimal effort put into the thought process of this show. Can WWE surprise me and salvage this card? Let’s find out!

Your hosts are JR & King for Raw, Cole & JBL for Smackdown and Styles & Tazz for the one ECW match!

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Eddie left us ten months ago, but you would never know it by these horrible angles they’ve been doing EVER SINCE. I just don’t understand how the people closest to him could find every angle that has been done since he died as honorable to his life. Seriously, when will the exploiting of this superstar end? A brawl erupts to start which ends with Chavo getting dumped out to the floor. Chavo gets nailed with a baseball slide, but avoids a pescado and delivers one of his own. Back in, Chavo punishes Rey in the corner while screaming at him that Eddie is his blood. Rey fights out with kicks. Chavo cuts Rey off as he catches Rey off a charge and drops him face-first onto the top buckle. Haha at one point, Chavo punishes Rey’s mask off so Rey scurries around the ring while he gets his mask back on. Back in, Rey gets lifted out onto the apron. Chavo nails him and climbs the turnbuckle to try and POWERBOMB Rey out to the floor, but Rey counters and they end up slamming each other’s face onto the canvas. Rey dropkicks the knee and connects with a springboard crossbody for two. Chavo comes back with a European uppercut but goes down a drop toe hold. Rey kicks Chavo in the head for another two. Chavo catches Rey up top but he’s still able to counter and deliver a headscissors to set up the 619. Rey connects and goes for the LA SILLA, but Chavo ducks. Rey charges and ranas Chavo out to the floor. They fire away on each other down on their knees as Vicki Guerrero comes down. She stops Chavo after he tosses Rey back in to try and get him to stop fighting. He won’t listen, so she slaps him. By the way, this crowd has been booing everything but the very few high spots. While Chavo is distracted, Rey comes off the apron and dives down on top of him. Chavo gets back as Rey remains on the apron while Vicki begins to yell at HIM! Chavo takes advantage and suplexes Rey back in the ring. Chavo holds on to begin the Three Amigos. That actually has got more cheers than any other time it has been done this year. Rey flips out of the third suplex and snaps off a rana. Vicki stays out on the floor screaming, “Stop fighting!” Now Rey goes for the Three Amigos and he connects with all three. Rey goes up top for the FROGSPLASH, but Vicki climbs up on the apron and accidentally crotches Rey. Chavo hits the BRAINBUSTER and the FROGSPLASH for the win. (11:00) This was just TOO weird on every level. One of the worst PPV matches I’ve seen in WWE for both guys. *½

WWE Champ Edge and Women’s Champ Lita stop by the World Champ King Booker and Sharmell’s dressing room. They take offense to his comments that he made in his OWN dressing room about being the most powerful couple in WWE. Edge and Lita are better because unlike Sharmell, Lita is the Women’s Champion. By Edge’s scorecard, that makes him and Lita the most powerful couple in WWE. Booker makes a bet with Edge that if he loses his belt that he will have to come to Smackdown and kiss his feet. Edge returns the favor and says that if Booker loses his belt, that he will have to be his royal servant on Raw for one night. Oh, it’s on.

ECW World Champion The Big Show vs. Sabu – Extreme Rules Match

In case you don’t watch/care for ECW, Sabu beat RVD in a ladder match to earn a shot at the ECW World title. Sabu tries for the win early by drilling Show to the mat with a steel chair. He can’t get the three off an ARABIAN FACEBUSTER, so he sets up for the TRIPLE-JUMP MOONSAULT. That ends when Big Show trips Sabu and sends him face-first to the steel chair. Show stomps on the chair and starts up his offense of headbutts and open-hand chops. After that, a bearhug! This IS extreme! Sabu fights out but gets caught off a springboard and is thrown out to the floor. Sabu hotshots Show from the apron and tosses a chair in his face. Sabu gets back in and puts Show down with the assist of the chair for only a one count. Next up, Sabu brings a table into the ring and delivers a chair-assisted faceslam through the table. Big Show comes back and catches Sabu off guard in the corner and drops him with an electric-chair drop. Show drags Sabu over to the corner and connects with a pump-splash (!). Sabu is out so Show decides to throw the steel steps AND a table into the ring. He makes a scaffold out of them and soon after; Sabu runs over and slides the table off the steps. Way to go. Evidently he was trying to springboard DDT Show through the table, as he jumps on Show and drops him through the table. Sabu sets up another table in the ring. He tries to spring off it, but Show catches him and delivers the CHOKESLAM through the table to retain the belt. (8:32) I think Sabu has screwed up more spots in the last week than the number of matches he’s had during his whole WWE tenure. *

They recap the Diva Search finals from Wednesday night. By the way, I wonder what rating that received. Layla won. After that little series of clips, Trish and the good girl Divas all try and act mean to Layla by saying just because she won a contest, doesn’t make her a WWE Diva. Trish is just pulling her leg though. The real initiation begins as they take Layla into the shower for a good ol’ time.

Randy Orton vs. Hulk Hogan

JR confesses that the Hulkster has a torn ligament, but is still going to compete tonight. Hulk gets his usual reaction from the crowd. Hogan shoves out of the lock-up and flexes to kicks things off. They lock up again, but this time Orton grabs a headlock. Hulk quickly pushes Orton into the ropes for a shoulderblock. Orton grabs another headlock while the crowd chants for Hogan. Hulk powers out with an overhead wristlock. Orton fires back and puts Hogan down with a European uppercut. Hogan blocks a head to the buckle and delivers his own before going up for the ten-count corner punch. Hulk puts Randy down with a running clothesline and starts ripping at his face while asking him how bad he wants to date Brooke Hogan. Now Hogan delivers the back rakes and mounts for punches. Orton rolls out of the ring off a whip and pulls Hulk out on the apron to work the knee. Back in, Orton delivers more cliché yet effective damage done to the knee. Orton goes up top and tries for the crossbody block, but Hogan avoids it. Hulk fights back with rights and tries for the big boot, but Orton slide underneath it and puts him down with a nice standing dropkick. The best thing I’ve seen in this match. It’s RKO time! He nails it and covers for the 3! The ref then calls for the match to continue as he NOTICED that Hogan’s foot was on the bottom rope. Orton cusses out the ref before going over to punch on Hogan. That proves to be a bad thing as Hogan HULKS up and points the finger. It’s over, folks. Big boot, the LEG DROP and the three count. Next match. (10:58) Typical Hogan-formula match that’s been DONE. ½*

Melina stops by to talk to Mick, as he seems a little nervous about his upcoming “I Quit” match with Ric Flair because of that scary look he had in his eye from last Tuesday night. Melina reiterates that she is a “manager of champions” and she doesn’t associate with losers. That gets Mick fired up as he begins to become more confident with every word he speaks!

Mick Foley vs. Ric Flair – “I Quit” Match

Foley hammers Flair down in the corner and charges in with the knee to start the match. He follows that up by running a trash can into Flair’s face. BANG BANG! It’s Mr. Socko/Mandible Claw time! Foley puts him down and then takes the sock out of his mouth to ask him if he’s ready to quit. Flair says nothing so Foley wraps Socko in barbed wire. Flair is ready for him though and comes back with a testicular claw and then a field goal kick to the balls! Flair now puts on the barbed-wire wrapped Socko and CHOPS Foley in the chest! Hahaha! That might be the best use of a barbed-wire wrapped sock I’ve ever seen. And I’ve seen some CRAZY uses for tube socks in my day. Flair ends up chopping Foley out to the floor to set up the insane knees-first whip into the steps. Foley knocks down Flair and pulls one of those barbed-wire boards from underneath the ring and slams it in Flair’s face! That busts him open pretty good too. Back in, Foley works on the cut forehead with the barbed-wire wrapped sock. Next, Foley grabs the barbed-wire board and slams it in Flair’s face not once, but twice! Foley grabs the mic and asks Flair if he wants to quit, but Flair responds with, “Kiss my…” WHAM! Foley nails him in the face with the microphone. Since Flair won’t quit, Foley is about to make things worse! He pulls out the bag of thumbtacks and SLAMS Flair on top of them! Screw you to people who say Hogan is better than Flair. Foley asks him again if he wants to quit, but Flair says nothing. Since he doesn’t give up, Foley makes it worse by bringing in a barbed-wire wrapped baseball bat and grinds Flair’s eye in it! Flair’s trick knee acts up as he stops Foley momentarily with a low blow. With the tacks still in his arm, Flair runs Foley shoulder-first into the steel post. He grabs the baseball bat and starts beating the CRAP out of Foley with it! Flair punches Foley around the ring and then asks him to quit for the first time in the match. Flair ~ “You quit or I’ll kill you right here! I will tear out your heart!” That had me laughing. Since he won’t quit either, Flair grabs the testicular claw again as every guy in the arena groans. Get this dude off me, man! He’s CRAZY! Flair charges at Foley once he’s on the apron and sends him flying out to the floor. I think his head landed on a trash can too! Some trainers and Melina come down to check on Mick and announces that the match is over. Flair is NOT going to win this way and gets on the mic and tells Foley to get back in the ring! He won’t get up, so Flair goes out after him and brings him back in the ring. Flair stomps him and then grinds barbed-wire into Foley’s eye! Melina comes over and throws a towel in the ring for Mick and the ref calls for the bell for the second time in this match. Melina takes the mic and begs Flair to stop, but Flair grabs the mic and says that she can not quit for Foley! He brings the barbed-wire bat back in the ring and goes to swing even though Melina is in the way! Just before Flair comes down on him, Foley grabs the mic and screams “I quit!” (13:13) Flair acts like he’s still going to swing for the fences, but doesn’t and walks away the winner. Now THAT is how you do an “Extreme Rules” match. Minus the horrible finish, this was really good stuff from 57 YEAR-OLD Ric Flair. ***½

In the back, Vince and Shane hang out with Armando Alejandro Estrada! Ha Ha!

World Champion King Booker (w/Queen Sharmell) vs. Batista

Note to WWE: the “All Hail King Booker” nonsense is ANNOYING! It was okay the first two or three times I heard it, but now it’s just terrible to have to sit through. Standard beginning ends with Booker being taken down by Batista after trying a spin kick. Booker takes a walk out to the floor and Sharmell wants to leave, but Booker says no! Batista comes up from behind and takes Booker back in the ring. Batista ducks a spin kick and delivers a spinebuster. He calls for the DEMON BOMB, but Booker avoids it and rolls to the apron. Booker hits a hotshot outside the ring and then comes in and delivers one inside the ring as well. Booker hooks on a chinlock while the crowd begins to chant “boring”. I’ve been more of a Smackdown fan than a Raw fan this past year, but you do NOT want the crowd chanting boring during your main event when WWE already looks at you as second rate as it is. Batista elbows out but gets backed into the corner. Booker’s whip is reversed and met with a belly-to-belly suplex out of the corner by Batista. Who does he think he is now, Scott Steiner? Batista covers for two. Booker kicks Batista away and goes out on the floor. While Sharmell is busy with the ref, Booker grabs his royal scepter and nails Batista in the head with it! Hey, it worked for Sergeant Slaughter! Back in, Booker covers for 1, 2, NO! Batista is tougher than the WARRIOR! Now Booker works on the formerly-torn tricep. Batista fights up and ducks a spin kick which makes Booker crotch himself on the top rope. Batista ducks a clothesline and crotches Booker on the top rope again. Batista connects with a pair of clotheslines and a side-slam for two. The crowd is booing! Batista follows Booker out to the floor and gets rammed shoulder-first into the steps. Back in, Booker delivers the missile dropkick and covers for 1, 2, NO! If only this were WCW 1998, it would’ve been over for sure! Uh oh, the BOOK END gets 1, 2, NO! Next up, Booker goes for the SCISSORS KICK, but Batista avoids it and delivers a JACKHAMMER for 1, 2, NO! Haha, the crowd chants “Goldberg” just like I hoped they would. Batista comes at Booker with shoulderblocks in the corner and whips Booker in for a clothesline. He tries again, but Booker avoids it and fights out with a neckbreaker for two. Batista counters the BOOK END into a full-nelson slam. So he’s ripping off the Patriot now? He’s ready for the DEMON BOMB, but Sharmell isn’t as she comes in to try and stop Batista. Nick Patrick does not allow it and calls for the DQ. (10:29) After the bell, Booker hits an axe kick but can’t get the SCISSORS KICK this time either and takes a spinebuster! Batista has a hard time lifting Booker up for the DEMON BOMB, so the camera zooms in close as he finally finishes the move. The DQ finish should just make him even more intense and hungry for the belt, so it’s the way to go. Even though the match was extremely ordinary, it included the best finish that I’ve seen all night. **

In the men’s locker room, Shawn Michaels and Triple H try to negotiate with a monster that’s bigger than Umaga. You mean there IS such a thing?!

Shawn Michaels & Triple H vs. Vince & Shane McMahon

Before the match begins, Vince sends out the Spirit Squad to soften up DX for their match. They get destroyed as quickly as they came. Next, Vince sends down Mr. Kennedy, William Regal and Finlay (who actually gets a nice face reaction). They have better luck, but still get tossed aside like meaningless jobbers. Vince and Shane remain on the entrance ramp as they bring out their next resource: The Big Show. Regal pulls out Triple H for the Smackdown guys to triple-team while Show gives Michaels a COBRA CLUTCH BACKBREAKER in the ring. Show comes down and posts H and then CHOKESLAMS him through the ECW announce table. Vince and Shane are now ready to compete as the Smackdown guys and Big Show exit the ringside area. They mock DX before they actually make any contact and once they do, it’s Vince giving Shawn a slam. They take turns tagging in and out and embarrassing Shawn while keeping Triple H beaten down on the floor. Next up, they start imitating double-team moves of great tag teams like Demolition, Hart Foundation and LOD. Shane covers for 1, 2, NO! Shane covers again for two. Shawn fights back and then takes down both Vince and Shane with a double-clothesline. Triple H finally makes it up onto the apron and gets the hot tag. He hits his five big moves (clothesline, running knee, neckbreaker, facebuster, spinebuster) on both Vince and Shane. HBK comes off the top onto Vince with the flying elbow drop. HBK and Shane tumble out to the floor while Triple H waits for Vince to get up so he can nail the PEDIGREE. Oh wait, he won’t get it because here comes UMAGA! He breaks up the PEDIGREE with the SAMOAN SPIKE while Armando is with the ref, but then gets chased off to the back by DX’s backup: Kane. Vince covers Triple H for 1, 2, NO! Vince didn’t get the three-count, so he decks the referee. Shane sets up H for the trashcan-assisted COAST TO COAST missile dropkick, but HBK catches Shane on the way down with SWEET CHIN MUSIC! Vince turns around into a trashcan shot by Triple H. Shawn’s SWEET CHIN MUSIC staggers him into the PEDIGREE for the three-count. (13:36) The match time I listed is actual physical interaction between the McMahons and DX. This is just more of the same stuff we’ve been seeing all year. Will someone please remind me what the POINT of this feud was to begin with? **¼

WWE Champion Edge (w/Women’s Champion Lita) vs. John Cena

This is the fourteenth televised Edge vs. Cena combination we’ve seen this year. Going into this match, Cena has nine wins with Edge having four wins. Ouch! Cena gets BOOED in his home town! By the way, the DQ rule is waived so Edge can lose the belt if he gets disqualified. The story for this one is, “Can John Cena maintain his focus and regain the title or will he let his frustration and anger get the best of him?” Cena beats Edge down in the corner to start and then delivers a belly-to-belly suplex for two. His momentum ends for the time being as Edge avoids a charge and lets Cena run shoulder-first into the ringpost. That is SO overplayed, you guys. Edge tries to get the countout victory, but Cena gets in at nine and is met with stomps from the champ. A standing dropkick from Edge sends Cena out on the apron, so Edge knocks him off onto the barricade to try once again for that countout victory. Cena dives back in at nine while the crowd chants “Cena sucks!” and is met with an elbow drop to the back. Edge covers for 1, 2, NO! Cena tries to come back, but goes down to a spinning heel kick from Edge for 1, 2, NO! They trade blows which end with Cena delivering a release fisherman suplex for 1, 2, NO! Edge reverses a whip and tosses Cena out to the floor to try and get that countout victory once more, but Cena dives back in at eight this time. Cena wins a slugfest but whiffs on a crossbody block. Edge nails a clothesline and applies a chinlock. Cena fights out but then goes down again to a big boot for 1, 2, NO! Edge goes up top but is met there by Cena. Cena gets knocked off for Edge to come down with a flying clothesline for 1, 2, NO! Cena applies a camel clutch so JR assumes Edge thinks he’s Iron Sheik. I know it was his move, but he’s not the only person in HISTORY to ever do it. Cena stands up out of it and drops Edge down on the canvas. It would’ve been cooler had Edge countered it into the Edge-o-Matic, but you take what you can get. Cena fights back and hits a bulldog as Lita tosses a chair in the ring for Edge. He looks at her like, “What are you thinking?” and throws the chair out of the ring. Edge turns around into three shoulderblocks, a Protobomb, and the Five-Knuckle Shuffle. FU? NO! Edge counters into the EDGECUTION! JR ~ “Impaler DDT!” Cover 1, 2, NO! Edge goes up top again, but Cena follows him up there and lifts Edge up on his shoulders to attempt an FU! Edge slips out, but Cena comes back with a victory roll for 1, 2, NO! Cena charges and runs into a boot and then takes a crossbody block from Edge, but he rolls through and lifts Edge up into the FU! Lita jumps up on the apron as Edge slips out and inadvertently knocks her down. Cena rolls up Edge for 1, 2, NO! Double-KO! Both men are up at seven. Edge comes out of a slam and comes down with the Edge-o-Matic for 1, 2, NO! Now Edge gets poised for the SPEAR, but Cena surprises Edge and drop toeholds him into the STFU! What the heck? Lita grabs the belt and acts like she’s going to nail Cena in the face with it while he has Edge in the STFU, but Edge begs her not to do it and then makes the ropes! This crowd is CHEERING big time. The ref pushes Cena away from Edge since he’s in the ropes, so Lita quickly slides a pair of brass knucks on Edge’s hand! Edge charges at Cena and gets lifted up into the FU! Lita jumps in the ring and leaps on top of Edge and gets slammed to the mat. Edge slips off Cena’s back and nails him in the back of the head with the knucks. The ref turns around while Edge covers Cena for the three-count to retain the title. (15:42) This was like all their matches rolled into one. The bad thing is that even after all the matches they’ve had this year, they still can’t quite seem to make anything but the last five minutes great. If they could just get the first part figured out, then I see no reason why these two couldn’t put on the 2006 WWE Match of the Year. But for me, they just have not got it down yet. ***¼

Final Thoughts: SummerSlam used to be my favorite PPV and I was very happy when it redeemed itself last year by having such a great show after two less than spectacular ones from ’03 and ’04 after its amazing hot streak from ’98-’02. With these feuds they had this year, they were either over-exposed or something people didn’t care enough about to see in the first place. By the way, why not have the WWE tag champs London and Kendrick, take on the Pitbulls for a rematch on this show? That would’ve made for a better opener than Chavo/Rey simply because it was a feud than a “get the crowd started” kind of a match. What I did like about the show was the Foley/Flair match and the main event (as you probably already knew). To sum it up, there was just too much bad surrounding the very little good for me to give this any thing more than a thumbs down.

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