August 6, 2004
Louis Izzo
WWF WRESTLEFEST 1992: WWF SUPERSTARS IN ACTION!
- The Hosts for this Coliseum Video are thankfully Mean Gene Okerlund....and BOBBY HEENAN! YES! To make it even better, Okerlund is going to teach Heenan to play Tennis. Heenan in shorts is just too funny already. Heenan is prepared to play Tennis...and he's holding a ping Pong Paddle. He says if you play with the chinese guy he'll bring them egg rolls. Heenan continues complaining about the heat as we go to the first match.
- Virgil vs. Shawn Michaels (w/ Sensational Sherri):
From Madison Square Garden, about two weeks before WrestleMania VIII.
Virgil is sporting nose protection after Sid Justice broke his nose
ramming his face into a turnbuckle. How he broke it that way is beyond
me. Very early in Michaels' "HBK" gimmick as he's still feeling his way
around the gimmick. They lockup and Michaels takes Virgil to the corner
and punches the mask, hurting his hand in the process like an idiot.
Sherri kisses his hand to make it better and the two lockup again.
Michaels stops himself the second time, slaps Virgil in the face and
runs outside the ring to hide. Virgil goes after him with a roundhouse
right and we get a chase. Criss cross sequence and Virgil with a side
headlock. Michaels with an elbow to the side of the face in the corner
followed by a whip across the ring. Virgil does the flip over escape
and rolls up Michaels for two followed by a side headlock takeover.
Michaels takes Virgil to the corner again and hammers away with rights
and lefts. Irish whip is reversed and Virgil with a series of
clotheslines, but Michaels side steps a third, sending Virgil to the
outside. Back inside and Michaels removes the mask for a big blow to
the nose of Virgil, which he sells like he's been shot. Michaels with a
snapmare followed by a jumping foot stomp to the side of Virgil’s face.
Michaels hammers away at the mask which doesn't hurt his hand anymore.
Michaels pulls on the nose of Virgil possibly the dumbest offensive
move ever. Michaels with a boot to the face for a two count. Reverse
chin lock by Michaels and this kills a little time. Virgil powers up
with elbows to the midsection but Michaels puts him back down with a
big boot on the corner for two. Michaels continues hammering away at
the exposed face of Virgil, followed by a snapmare and choking.
Michaels continues his methodical offense. Virgil catches Michaels with
a back slide for two and Michaels puts him down again with a
clothesline for two of his own. Virgil eats the turnbuckle and the mask
goes flying. The referee recovers it for him and re-applies it. Irish
whip and Virgil slams Michaels face into the canvas and both men are
down. Virgil slaps his way up and nails Michaels with a series of
roundhouse rights followed by an atomic drop and inverted atomic drop.
Irish whip and Virgil with a back elbow followed by a clothesline and
dropkick! Virgil with a sloppy side Russian leg sweep for two. Michaels
is introduced to the turnbuckle and Virgil whips him across the ring.
Virgil misses a knee to the buckle and Michaels nails his unique
inverted back suplex out of nowhere for three at 12:11. **1/4 Too slow
and methodical to warrant anything higher, but it wasn't a bad match,
it was just a little slow. Michaels and Sherri celebrate in the ring
afterwards.
- WWF-Tag Team Championship Match:
Money Inc. (c) (w/ Jimmy Hart) vs. The Bushwhackers:
This ain't going to be pretty, especially with the Bushwhackers
included. This is either early in their second tenure as champions, or
around the Spring of 1992, can't really tell. The Marching Morons creep
out kids when they try licking them. We find out this is Money Inc's
first title reign. Money Inc. pound on the Bushwhackers to start, but a
whip partners into each other thing actually WORKS! Stomping continues
and a double bulldog is blocked with whips of Dibiase into IRS.
Bushwhackers bite the butts of their opponents and nail clotheslines to
clear the ring. Butch and I.R.S appear to start the match. IRS with a
knee to the midsection and a fist to the forehead. Dibiase comes in
with a fist and some choking behind the referees back. Dibiase hammers
away on Butch and Irwin comes in with some free blows to the
midsection. Irish whip to the corner and i.R.S eats boot. Butch with a
bulldog to I.R.S and Luke bulldogs Dibiase. double noggin knocker
followed by a battering ram to both men to clean the ring again. Luke
with a headlock on I.R.S, and Dibiase catches him with a knee to the
back. Double teaming by Money Inc. behind the referee's back and
Dibiase with an elbow drop. I love how the heels would clap their hands
behind the referee’s back, making it sound like they tagged. Damn, I
miss the old days, even though 1992 isn't old to some people. Anything
before 1990 is ancient to most people nowadays. Abdominal stretch by
Dibiase and three guesses how they cheat. Irish whip and Money Inc.
with a double back elbow. I.R.S with a weak leg drop (no elevation) for
two. Reverse chin lock by I.R.S and he's sent to the buckle. Dibiase
comes back in with blows to the midsection. Irish whip and Luke with a
boot to the face. Both teams tag so Butch hammers away on I.R.S and
nails clotheslines to both champions. Battering Ram to Schyster for
two. Luke hammers on Dibiase while Hart comes in with his megaphone.
Butch catches him but Irwin with a knee to the back followed by an
elbow drop gets three at 8:31 to retain the titles. DUD Like anyone
expected higher for this match. I like Dibiase, but really, wrestling
Butch & Luke is punishment in my books when it comes to ther WWF
run.
- Back to Okerlund & Heenan. Heenan whistles at some girls passing by while Gene gives the instructions of serving. Heenan seems to understand the rules. Gene hits Heenan in the groin by mistake with his racket, and Heenan tells him to watch out with the fly swatter. Gene serves and hits an old lady apparently, and Heenan and he share a laugh. Heenan stiffs a waitress for drinks, which Gene says is drugged. Heenan doesn't care, because it's free. Coming up next is a tennis match while we go to the action.
- "British Bulldog" Davey Boy Smith vs. Rick "The Model" Martel:
This has a chance to be a good match. Lockup and Martel with a series
of knees to the midsection and ramming his head to the buckle. Bulldog
reverses a whip to the corner but Martel flips around and poses.
Bulldog with a side headlock. Martel complains about a hair pull but
Bulldog objects...LOUDLY I might add. Martel ends up on the apron, so
Bulldog sling shots him back in. Arm bar by Bulldog but he's sent to
the corner. Martel misses an elbow to the turnbuckle and Bulldog
re-applies the arm bar. Irish whip and Bulldog blocks an arm drag with
one of his own. Bulldog applies an arm-scissors and turns it into an
arm bar. Irish whip and Model sends Bulldog out of the ring via the
second rope. Martel sneaks around and attack the back of Bulldog and
rams his back into the ring apron. Double axe-handle off the apron
connects and he tosses Bulldog back in the ring. Martel with an elbow
drop to the back followed by a knee drop. Martel rams Bulldog's face
into the turnbuckle and chokes away on the Brit. Irish whip to the
corner is reversed but Martel catches Bulldog with a knee to the face
for two. Irish whip and Bulldog catches Martel with boot to the face.
Atomic drop and clothesline by Bulldog and he follows up with another.
Irish whip and Martel runs to the outside where Bulldog rams his head
into the apron. Bulldog with a sunset flip back in, but Martel blocks
for two. Bulldog reverses it back and that gets three at 5:24?! *1/2
Nothing great, and shockingly short. I expected longer since Bulldog
never made a real comeback at the end.
- Bret "Hitman" Hart introduces us to clips of his best matches from 1991. We get the last two minutes from his match versus Mr. Perfect from Summerslam 1991 and some brief clips from the end if his match at This Tuesday In Texas against Skinner. Nothing earth shattering, and it seems the Skinner match has made it to about five different Coliseum Videos in 1991-92.
- WWF-Intercontinental Championship Match:
Bret "Hitman" Hart (c) vs. The Barbarian:
Why must WWF put Barbarian matches on every Coliseum Video! From a
Wrestling Challenge taping. Barbarian fits himself with the
Intercontinental Title while Hitman gives his sunglasses to some little
dork. Lockup and Barbarian takes Bret to the corner, where BRET with a
cheap shot!! Lockup and Barbarian with a standing side headlock. Irish
whip and Bret is knocked all the way into the entrance aisle with a
shoulder block!!! Bret gets back in the ring for another lockup where
he applies a headlock. Irish whip by The Barbarian and he nails another
nasty shoulder block. Bret bounces off the ropes and is put down again.
Bret tries a cross body press but Barbarian simply slams him down hard.
Bret avoids an elbow drop and hammers away on the Barbarian with
rights, followed by a wrist lock. Irish whip and Bret with a boot to
the face followed by another wrist lock, turned into an arm bar. Irish
whip and Bret ducks a big boot, only to be caught in a bear-hug. Bret
rakes the eyes to escape and applies another arm bar. Barbarian with a
cheap boot to the midsection followed by a stun gun. Barbarian sends
Bret outside the ring where he rams his back into the steel ring post
several times and stomps away at the back of his neck. Back in the ring
and Barbarian with a choke. Irish whip to the corner and Bret does the
100 mph bump chest first. Back breaker by The Barbarian gets a two
count. Barbarian applies a bear-hug, a very bad one I might add. Bret
tries pushing away from Barbarian but to no avail, so he rakes the eyes
for the break. Barbarian continues the punishment in the corner and
whips him across the ring and nailing a series of blows. Irish whip
again but this time Bret connects with a big boot followed by an
inverted atomic drop and clothesline for two! Back breaker by Bret and
he goes to the second rope for an elbow drop for another two count.
Hart with a side Russian leg sweep and that gets two as well. Barbarian
kicks out sends Bret out of the ring. Bret with a sunset flip back in
and that gets another two count. Barbarian with a delayed vertical
suplex and a cover for two. Barbarian picks Bret up, but he obviously
doesn't watch Bret Hart matches, because Bret is playing possum and
surprises him with a small package for the three count at 12:30. *1/4
too long and boring, but the end saved it from DUD's ville. I'm hoping
this match never aired on television, it sucked.
- Thankfully we go back to some Heenan/Okerlund skits. We immediately see Heenan can't play worth his life, missing balls left and right by miles, and when he actually does hit them, he sucks. His Mystery Opponent is Monica Sele's Sisters Best Friends Tennis Partner, and she's simply sitting in a lawn chair serving balls out of a basket. Heenan is whiffing balls by a mile! One nearly catches him in the groin, but the next one hits his head. He blames his sucking on the racket, which is what I do all the time when I'm on my D game. "Damn Racket! I'm not use to it."
- Tag Team Match Of The Month:
The Natural Disasters vs. The Nasty Boys (w/ Jimmy Hart):
Dear God, I really want a good match on this tape. Sags starts the
match with Typhoon, connecting with a series of elbows. Slam attempt
doesn't work so Typhoon slams him and connects with a clothesline.
Irish whip to the corner and Typhoon with an avalanche splash. Knobbs
tags in next for some bad mouthing. Earthquake tags in and we get a
showdown of Hogan friends. Shove-fest goes Earthquakes way and he nails
a shoulder block. Irish whip to the corner and Earthquake with another
shoulder block followed by an elbow drop. Sags catches Earthquake in
the back with a knee and hammers away on him. Apparently, he used the
megaphone instead. Knobbs tags in for some double teaming of Earthquake
and Knobbs hammers him. Sags with elbows to the back of the head
followed by a series of roundhouse rights in the corner. Knobbs with a
choke to Earthquake and we get some double teaming. Earthquake tries a
comeback but Sags stomps away at the left leg. Irish whip and
Earthquake is nails a series of back elbows followed by an eye rake.
Knobbs back in with more bad offense and shoulders to the midsection in
the corner. Irish whip to the corner is blocked and Quake with a big
boot. Sags comes in and tries a sunset flip. Quake squashes him for a
two count. Knobbs in with a clothesline so Quake with a bear hug.
Earthquake with an elbow drop on Sags for three at 6:31 and Typhoon
slams Jimmy Hart into Knobbs. -1/2* Total cluster-f*ck at the end, with
the pin not even being on camera. Typhoon was in the ring for all of 30
seconds, which makes it even worse.
- Fan Favorite Match; WWF-World Championship Match:
"Macho Man" Randy Savage (c) vs. Irwin R. Schyster (w/ Jimmy Hart):
Yes, finally something that has a chance to be really good. I.R.S is
one-half of the Tag Team Champions here, and Savage is only about four
days removed from winning the World Title from Ric Flair at
WrestleMania VIII. I'm pretty sure this match aired on Primetime
Wrestling, or whatever. I.R.S examines inside his
briefcase...FORSHADOWING! Savage offers Irwin into the ring but no
dice. Lockup and we get a lean break. Savage with a standing side
headlock. Irish whip by I.R.S. but Savage holds onto the hold. Savage
releases the hold and teases going after Hart outside the ring. Lockup
and Savage with another headlock. Irish whip and Savage with a shoulder
block followed by a hip toss and clothesline, sending Irwin to the
outside. Irwin already seems to be sweating buckets and its only a
minute or so into the match! Lockup is taken into the corner and Savage
catches a boot from Irwin and nails an atomic drop, sending Irwin over
the top rope to the floor. Savage dives to the outside and shoves
I.R.S. into Jimmy and throws him back into the ring, nailing a double
axe-handle off the top rope for a two count! Savage goes after Hart
again, allowing Irwin to drive a knee into his back and leg dropping
him between the legs. Irwin throws Savage over the top rope to the
outside where Hart gets a cheap shot with his ugly shoes. Irwin
introduces Savage's face into the steel steps and Hart mouths off to
the camera. Back in the ring and Savage with a sunset flip out of
nowhere for two. Irwin with a boot the midsection followed by an elbow
drop for two. Schyster with an abdominal stretch by Irwin and of course
he uses the ropes for leverage. Savage breaks the hold with an arm drag
and school boys I.R.S for two. Irwin with a headbutt and both men trade
blows. Savage with a series of left jabs, but he runs into a knee of
Irwin and lands outside the ring again. Irwin follows this time and
rams Savage's face into the apron and connects with an elbow across the
chin. Reverse chin lock applied by Schyster back in the ring, and again
uses the ropes for leverage. Schyster connects with an elbow drop and
goes to the top rope, eating boot on the way down. Savage rams Irwin’s
face into the buckle and whips him across the ring, connecting with a
back elbow. Another whip to the corner and Savage has Irwin by the
tongue....I mean tie. Savage with a cheap shot, but he misses a sit
down splash and now Irwin connects with the Write Off....for two!!!
Hart with the briefcase on the apron, and Savage sends Irwin into it
instead! Savage nails Jimmy off the apron and goes to the top rope,
connecting with the flying elbow drop for the win and to retain the
title at 11:15. ***1/2 Really good match overall. Savage was in a peak
of having good matches left and right at this point and this is no
exception.
- Time for an interesting little skit....How To Throw A Party....with THE BERZERKER!? Mr. Fuji talks to the camera, and we of course can't understand him much. Fuji pronounces Party "Potty". Step one time. "The Invitations". Berzerker actually talks ENGLISH! To get guests, you simply kidnap them while screaming "Huss! Huss!" Time for the second step for throwing a party...The Entertainment. To have a fun party, you have to have party favors. Berzerker eats the blow whistles and blows them backwards. Time for the third step...The Food. Berzerker’s favorite foods are finger sandwiches. He smears Peanut Butter on bread with his hand and opens the bag with his sword. Berzerker chokes on a Huss. Wow...this was pretty stupid.
- "El Matador" Tito Santana vs. Repo Man:
Can Santana carry Barry Darsow to a good match? This reporter says No,
but miracles have been known to happen. Taped from the same show as the
previous match. We get a lockup and Repo Man with a cheap shot. Irish
whip and Matador with a shoulder block, and Repo Man cowers in the
corner. Lockup #2 and Repo Man with a series of rights in the corner
and wrapping Santana’s arm around the rope. Arm bar by Repo Man and he
turns it into a wrist lock. Repo Man with a knee to the midsection.
Crisscross leads to Santana connecting with a series of arm drags and a
dropkick followed by an arm bar applied. Irish whip and Santana with a
flurry of rights followed by a cross body press for two. Matador
re-applies an arm bar and Repo does a Curly impression. Irish whip and
Santana school boys Repo Man for two. Repo sends Santana into the
corner and connects with a back suplex for two. Irish whip to the
corner and Repo Man connects with a clothesline for another two count.
Repo Man does a sneaky little dance and pounds on Santana followed by a
scoop slam. Repo Man connects with a leg drop for two again. Santana is
sent face first into the turnbuckle and Repo Man chokes him across the
top rope. Snapmare by Repo and he covers for two and applies a modified
cross armbar body scissors. Santana breaks free and catches Repo with a
sunset flip for two. Repo Man with a clothesline and Irish whip to the
corner. Santana ducks a clothesline and nails one of his own. Santana
pounds away on Repo with rights and connects with an elbow to the jaw.
Running clothesline by El Matador followed by a dropkick to the top of
the head. Santana calls for the end and nails the Paseo Del Muerte or
whatever. Repo ands outside the ring to recover. Repo grabs his tow
hook and rope and nails El Matador in the midsection with it, signaling
for the DQ at 7:34. Repo Man chokes El Matador with the rope after the
match and it takes a whole mess of officials to force him off. **
Shockingly, this was pretty decent by Repo Man standards, as he was not
a good singles wrestler. But protecting him is kind of foolish. EW! El
Matador is foaming at the mouth, but if this review was "X" rated I’d
say something else, but who knows who's reading this.
- Eight-Man Tag Team Match:
The Natural Disasters & Legion Of Doom (w/ Paul Elloring) vs. The
Nasty Boys & Money Inc. (w/ Jimmy Hart):
......NOT AGAIN WITH THE DISASTORS/NASTIES! Jesus, the first match with
them blew chunks, now I'm subjecting to another of their matches. This
is right before The Natural Disasters would win the World Tag Titles.
Dibiase starts the match against....(waits)...Road Warrior Hawk. Lockup
and Hawk shoves Dibiase into the corner. Repeat several times and
Dibiase gets upset. Ted Dibiase with a wrist lock, so Hawk simply
throws him off into the corner. Dibiase with a knee to the midsection
and rake of the eyes. Irish whip is reversed and Hawk with a series of
clotheslines. Nasties run in, and Animal clears them with a double
clothesline and the Natural Disasters pick up the leftovers. Irwin with
a wrist lock to Hawk, but it's reversed and Hawk with an arm bar. Irish
whip is reversed and Hawk with a back elbow followed by a big boot.
Hawk with a headbutt and he bounces off the ropes, being nailed with a
Dibiase a knee and getting double teamed. Hawk takes a beating in the
heel corner and so far has been the only legal man in the match for his
team. Sags in with an elbow to the jaw of Hawk and he applies a reverse
chin lock, driving the knee into Hawk's back in the process. Dibiase
tags in with clubbing shots to the neck followed by a swinging neck
breaker for two. Dibiase applies his own reverse chin lock but Hawk
battles out with elbows, only to be put down with a knee lift. Irwin
tags in and throws Hawk into his corner where the Nasties double team
him. Hawk catches Irwin with a clothesline. Dibiase tags in and boots
Hawk but a double clothesline puts both men down. Hawk FINALLY tags out
at the 7:00 mark and Animal comes in with a dropkick to Sags followed
by a clothesline to Knobbs, dropkick to Dibiase and clothesline to
I.R.S. Earthquake comes in illegally and all hell breaks loose. Typhoon
squashes Knobbs in the corner and Earthquake squashes Sags for a three
count at 7:58. THE SAME DAMN FINISH AS BEFORE?!! Well that was lame.
1/2* Nothing match, at least the heels made it somewhat decent and kept
the crap (Natural Disastors) out of the ring for 90% of the match.
- Back to Heenan & Gene and Heenan has been taking a beating all day. He tries jumping over the net, but pulls a me by landing on his crotch and falling down in pain. Some chicks recognize Gene Okerlund from WWF television, but ignore Bobby Heenan, who is still down on the ground. Gene hits on the girls while Heenan cries.
- Final Thoughts: The Okerlund and Heenan skits now and then throughout the tape pretty much saves it from a thumbs down. There are several decent-very good matches on the tape, but theres also a few bad matches. The good out-weighes the bad in my opinion, thanks to Heenan saving the tape with his comedy to block out the TERRIBLE Berzerker segment. Whoever thought of that should have been fired. Overall, a VERY Mild Thumbs Up Recommendation.